I was really stunned and as i looked at her i contemplated what next to do and finally i decided to make one last attempt, i went closer to her, but she immediately got up from the bed "see me see trouble oo, dis HE~GOAT leave me alone naw" i froze when i heard that word, and could not believe a day would come when a girl will call me that name 'talkless' of ordinary chinwe i gasped with horrow at what i just heard cos i hate anything insultive, then i stood up opened her door and left her room. As i walked towards my room i felt bad with the insult and embarassment i had just recieved but the most painful of all was that word HE~GOAT and it kept replaying and repeating in my head, as i lay on my bed that night i began reasoning on what other students would be thinking of me and i wondered whether they do call me a HE~GOAT at my back. Hmmm this isnt good i concluded and i soon slept off with that silly word replaying on my head.
Going to school the following morning i thought of all i had being doing since i got disvirgined and i saw that i had gotten nothing out of it, instead i had been wasting my money, time and myself. Even though i knew i had improved in my studies but then i still wondered whether everyone sees me as a HE~GOAT, and as i went to school that morning i decided to limit and hold myself in anything s.exual even though i knew it was almost impossible for me, but then i hate that word HE~GOAT and i just wished i was a virgin again. I barely concentrated in school that day and around 12noon i was sitting inside my car with agatha, i parked my car under a tree around her department, "whats wrong with you today" she asked me and i just smiled and said nothing, only if i could concentrate on one girl i thought but then it would not still be easy cos they all have their separate functions especially chinwe who always helps me with food, laundry and quick se.x, sussy also helps out a great deal but now in my reserve 'incase', and then agatha whom i cherish so much but then she was a virgin and i valued her dignity and am reserving her for my future, the other friends like judith and the rest i could afford to forget them but i still needed the first three but yet i still wanted to change for good....
To be continued
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