after going through @itzprince good bye my love.. I remembered this story that has been with my since....
To My One and Only Love,
I can't believe I didn't tell you before. And now, here I am, at my deathbed, writing to you. I guess it just hurts; that I'm never going to get married, have kids, or even graduate high school. I'm deeply sorry I was too cruel to tell you before. But it's like you always say, Life does Terrible Things. And within those Terrible Things we learn. We learn not only how to handle our problems, but we learn about ourselves, our morale, our character. You even learn about the people around you. I will never forget those wise words on your part. Now that I'm here, finally awaiting for death to escape with my breath, I suddenly remember the important and unimportant, what mattered and what didn't.
Remember when we first met? When I first moved schools? I had scars on my wrists, and I never seemed to smile, for I knew the truth back then. I told myself, "I cannot fall in love, my goal is to at least survive freshman year." I had so many impossible goals, for I so desperately wanted to feel like I have a purpose, that I'm not just some huge bother to everyone around me. I felt depressed and lonely, and felt like no one could ever love a lump like me. Then You happened. I still remember how you shyly approached me, blushing as you stumbled upon your words. Then I cracked a joke, and you eased up a bit, and you turned out to be quite the comedian. Just one of your stupid jokes that made no sense made me laugh like an insane person, and it was such a relief to laugh again. You began talking to me even more, I guess only you know why, until finally you asked me out, although you stuttered the question and took you multiple tries.
Remember our first date? And I must say, you truly know your way around a girl's heart, and you proved it to me as we walked together on the shoreline, your hand wrapped in my mine, as a signal to me that you never wanted to let me go. It was the way you comforted me when I confessed to you my fear of water and you taught me to only see the beauty of the ocean, not the fear itself. The way you hugged me when I commented how cold the weather was, and how easily you would sacrifice yourself for me.
And yet, I still didn't have the heart to tell you. There's no excuse for what I did. I guess I just loved you too much that I couldn't ruin what we had. Not like it ruined the rest of my life.
After the perfect date, you asked me to be yours, but not be yours for the while, but forever.
When you asked, I immediately knew I had to tell you. After a long time of contemplating, I finally had the courage to tell you, but unfortunately that was right before your father died, and I couldn't bear to hurt you furthermore. When you finally began to smile again and be yourself, I really wanted to remind you of how I'll be there forever and ever for you. That no matter what happens, you would always have me. Although any fool would know better than to promise that.
I really wanted to be there for you, too bad life is always such a pain in the arse. Remember that trip I went on, where you kept asking me when I was going to come home? I lied. I spent those days lying in a hospital bed, not in Nigeria with family. Remember that week I disappeared from school? I almost died during that week, I didn't have the flu. Remember the entire summer in which we lost contact? That was the summer I was in and out of a coma, not extremely busy with volunteer work. And so, this is me, telling you the truth- the truth about me. I absolutely regret lying to you, but you weren't quite yourself yet, so I couldn't hurt you like that.
My love, I only have a couple hours to live, or so they say, because I feel like I can drop any minute now. Think about it: these are my last precious minutes and I'm writing you a letter. That's how much I love you. By now, you've most likely heard of my hospitalization, due to a pack of lies I've asked my family to tell.
But I write this to tell you the truth.
I really, really love you. I want you to know that. I never told you because I couldn't bear to tell you, to hurt you. I'd rather live without you, knowing I didn't hurt you, than crush you in this way.
But my foolish mind kept telling me, "Break up with him! You're getting worse!" And that's why I did what I did, why I sobbed and choked up when I broke up with you.
It's only because I could never let you go, but I just had to. I remember how you silently wiped your tears away, trying your hardest not to sob in front of me. I cannot explain to you how overwhelmed with guilt I felt when I still couldn't tell you the truth.
As I'm wiping away my tears now, all I can think of are past jokes you've told me, the way your nose crinkled a bit whenever you'd laugh. How you always noticed the little things, that weren't noticeable yet so important. I love how you loved life, how you were never afraid to live it. Never let that feeling go, my love.
Remember the quote we came up with? "Don't worry if you miss the Sun, because you can still find opportunities in the Moon and Stars." Just think of me as your Sun, and the rest of you life, goals, future, and dreams as your Moon and Stars.
Please, just promise me that you'll marry someone worth your while, someone who will love you more than I ever could, and that you never, ever forget me. Our 'couple' saying was "forever and always, to infinity and beyond". Well death is certainly beyond infinity. I love you. Even after I die, I ask that you never give up, and that you live the life I never could have. You have a place in this world, a destiny, I do not. You are yet to find your place in this world, yet it's too late for me. Did I mention I love you? Promise me you will marry someone who loves you... promise me you will keep everything about us alive,my spirit will always be with you..
goodbye my love
goodbye my comedian .
#THE_END.
still your boy pricelezz.
follow me up
insta :Mrpricelezz1.
