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GRAND COMEDY HOUSE STORY BY DINDY

GRAND COMEDY HOUSE STORY BY DINDY

By Dindy in 14 Nov 2016 | 16:31
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Dindy Dindy

Dindy Dindy

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GRAND COMEDY HOUSE (STORY BY DINDY) EPISODE 1

Please do not share without talking to me personally and asking for permission, thank you for reading this story.
This story contains 5 episodes only, thanks for reading.

.....STORY BEGINS.....
Laugher, comedy and Jokes, are not just words, but happiness to life's existence.
Time built up a generation of humans with unnamed characters and languages, of course not languages of the tongue, but languages of the brain which always results in jokes and laugher for the soul.
Life was given to a man and a woman to bring froth new breathing humans to the earth. I was amongst those breathing humans that were brought forth.
My name is Dae dae and my family is a warzone of comedy against jokes.
I'm the last born, I have two brothers and sisters named; Hassan, Veron, Anita and Sonie, and my dad and mum. --Belief you me, I'm the black sheep of the family--.
Our life was full of fan and troubles which I regularly caused. Ok wait maybe I should stop talking right now and just take you guys to the main story here.
.........LET'S BEGIN.......
Dad: "Hassan", called my dad as he sat in his favorite wooden chair.
Dad: "Ah, where is this boy I just called now?, he questioned himself.
Dad: "He didn't even answer his name when I called him", he said.
..........MEAN WHILE........
Hassan: "Dad is calling me let me quickly go before he gets angry", he said as he approached the door.
Dea dea: "What do you think you are doing?", I asked.
Hassan: "I'm going to shave the hair inside my brain, don't ask me each question again", he said.
Dea dea: "Bro you're fu*king up, real niggas fear no one not even their dad", I said.
Hassan: "You are right bro, so what should I do?", he asked.
Dea dea: [Smile] Chew gum and walk slowing like a nigga. Remember if you wanna be a nigga, you gat to act like one bro", I said convincing him.
Hassan: "You're right bro, I won't fear dad any more!", he said as he took the chewing gum I left on the table, then walked out.
Dea dea: "[Laughs] Hassan you're so gonna be a die nigga, RIP bro", i said laughing heavily.
I stood up from where I sat, to go see the event which I plotted to unfold its evil self :D .
Dad: "Hassan! Hassan!", called my dad loudly
Hassan: "Yes dad, I'm here what do you want?", he said as he approached my dad walking like a nigga and cchew the gum slowly.
Dad: "Are you ok?", asked my dad looking at him confused.
Hassan: "Yea dad, tell me what yuh want man", he ordered.
Dad: " You're chewing gum, So you are now a wassup nigga", he said.
Hassan: "Yea man", he said chewing the gum more slowly.
Dad: "Ok Mr nigga, there's something on your head, bend down so that I will clean it off for you", he said stretching his left hand towards his head.
Hassan: "Ok man, do it quickly, I ain't gat no time for that", he said as he bent down his head.
My dad's hand folded into a fist and a heavy knock landed on Hassan's head, making the chewing gum in his mouth to fall off and making his head to duck down in-between his shoulders
I laughed hard due to what i saw and tears came out my eyes.
Dad: "Are you still a nigga?, asked my dad
Hassan: "[Crying] no daddy", he said rubbing his head with both hands and crying.
Dad: "Now pick up that chewing gum and put it in the middle of your head, if you beg me you will hate yourself", he said pointing at Hassan.
Hassan: "Daddy, daddy, daddy", he said crying.
Dad: "Do you wanna beg me?", he asked.
Hassan: "No dad, I just wanna say you look beautiful under the moon light", he talked confused because of the brain cracking knock.
Dad: "C'mon shut up and do what I told you to do. Make sure you pass it down on your head", he said.
Hassan slowly picked up the chewing gum and passed it down on his head. My laugher became harder as my eyes saw what went on.
Dad: "Now go get me water from the kitchen and you better don't remove that gum from your head, or else you will hate me", he said.
Hassan walked to the kitchen crying, while I laughed uncontrollably. When he came out of the kitchen and gave my dad the water he held, I looked at his face and I could no more control the happiness that my plan worked.
Dea dea: "[Laughs] you fell for my tricks ooo", I said laughing like a mad dog with tears running down my eyes, as i walked out from my hiding place.
Dad: "So Dea dea, it was you that made Hassan act like this?, how many times have i told you to stop your tricks?", he questioned me angrily as he walked towards me
Hassan: "I will kill you Dea dea, you tricked me", he said walking towards me.
Dea dea: "[Stops laughs] Oh no", I said as I calculated my movement.
I quickly ran towards the corner of the parlour, escaping to be caught by my dad and bro, then running out side.
Dad: "Come here you stubborn boy", he said running after me.
Hassan: "I will kill you", he said as he pulled the chewing gum off his head running toward me.
I got to the gate and it was locked.
Dad: "I will so beat you today", he said walking towards me knowing I had no where to run to.
Hassan: "I will put this chewing gum in your nose", he said removing all the gum on his head.
I looked left and right, then smile heavily and took a run to the fence which was at my right, then climbed it.
Dea dea: "[Tongue out] You can't catch me, chewing gum boy", I said to Hassan laughing, knowing it would provoke him.
Hassan: "Your real daddy!, your real daddy!, you hear me?", he said forgetting my dad was right beside him.
My dad looked at him, with a face of "I will kill you"...... To be continue.

STORY BY DINDY AKA NNAMDI
contact me on
Whatsapp/Viber: 07087750433
Email: [email protected]
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Email: [email protected] Facebook: Ossy andy Nnamdi
Skype: 07087750433
or
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Twitter: @nnamdiossy
INSTAGRAM: @ossynnamdi
14 Nov 2016 | 16:31
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[b]FAST LINKS TO AVAILABLE EPISODES [/b] Episode 2 nd 3 Episode 4 Episode 5 (last episode)
14 Nov 2016 | 16:38
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Lol
14 Nov 2016 | 16:44
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kukukuku
14 Nov 2016 | 16:45
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Laughing really hard
14 Nov 2016 | 16:50
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lolx,,continue pls
14 Nov 2016 | 16:52
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LMAO
14 Nov 2016 | 16:53
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Seated….
14 Nov 2016 | 17:12
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Lwkmd o...
14 Nov 2016 | 17:20
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Lmao please continue oh!!!
14 Nov 2016 | 17:37
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OK seated
14 Nov 2016 | 18:03
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ugh!
14 Nov 2016 | 19:08
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GRAND COMEDY HOUSE (STORY BY DINDY) EPISODE 2 Please do not share without talking to me personally and asking for permission, thank you for reading this story. [Laughs] That was funny right? He fell like a log of wood for my little trick. I know you guys might wonder what happened to Hassan that day, well let me just say he had luck and my dad left him. As for me, i was caught and punished badly by my dad. I know I'm a bad guy, but I only act that way if provoked or if I wanna teach you a lesson. Ah!, That reminds me of a day when Veron took what was mine. ............STORY BEGINS.......... Veron: "You're too small to own this", he said as he took it from my hand. Dea dea: "Give it back Veron", I said as I reached for it. Veron: "Back off small kid", he said provoking me. Dea dea: "Give it back, stop it bro!", I said trying to get it from him. Veron: "What're you gonna do if I don't give it back?", he said changing the position of his hold on it. Dea dea: "Stop it bro!", I shouted angrily. Veron: "Answer my question, will you cry huh", he said lifting his left hand higher than my reach. Dea dea: "I hate you!", I said angrily. Veron: "Hy guess what?, I hate you too", he said then placed his right hand on my face and pushed me to the ground. Dea dea: "You will pay for this, I promise you", I said to him angrily as I sat on the floor. Veron: "News flash street rat, the only thing I will be paying for is your hospital bills, if you try anything with me", he said pointing at me. Veron: "You got that?", he said then walked away from where I was. After he left, I spoke within myself. Dea dea: "So Veron has grown wings abi?", I said to myself. Dea dea: "Veron, my little senior brother is forming king for me", I said to myself as I stood up from the floor. Dea dea: "He called me a kid ba?", I said as my hands beat my chest. Dea dea: "He had the mind to take my iPod that uncle gave me", I said to myself. Dea dea: "I will show him fire I promise and we shall see who will pay who's hospital bills", I said to myself. .....2 WEEKS LATER..... Veron had already forgotten what he did to me, but I hadn't because I always saw him using the iPod he took from me forcefully. Veron had plans the next day, to go watch a movie in the cinema, so he went to tell Dad. Veron: "Dad I'm going out tomorrow", he said to my dad. Dad: "Where're you going to?", he asked. Veron: "I'm going to the cinema", he said. Dad: "To do what there", he asked. Veron: "To fry akara for grand ma", he said in a low tone for my dad not to hear it. Dad: "What did you say?", asked my dad. Veron: "I said, I wanna watch a movie", he said. Dad: "Ok, but take Dea dea along with you", he said. Veron: "But dad", he said. Dad: "Not buts, I and Hassan are going somewhere tomorrow, and your mum and sisters are going to the market", he said. Dad: "So it's either you take him along or you stay at home with him", he said. Veron: "Dad, I don't like it at all", he said as he stood up and walked out from the parlour. Dad: "That is your own piece of roasted chin chin, if you like eat it, if you like refry it!", he said aloud wanting Veron to hear his voice well enough. ......THE NEXT DAY...... The next day, Veron told me that we were going to the cinema to watch a movie, I was happy and I mean very happy --That kin evil happiness ;)--. I went to bath quickly and dress up quickly because I knew who Veron was, he could do crazy things --But not more than me--. As we got closer to the cinema, Veron warned me not to misbehave or he would deal with me badly. I looked at him and said nothing. When we got to the cinema, Veron told me to wait, so that he could get tickets for two (me and him). I went to stand in a corner, looking around and seeing different people. He later came back with two tickets in his hands and a popcorn for only him with a soft drink. Veron: "Let's go watch the movie", he said. Veron: "By the way, don't hope on this soft drink and popcorn in my hand, if you want yours go get it kid", he said provoking me, but I said nothing. 30mins into the movie, I was very angry and upset because of all the things he did to me. Dea dea: "You took my iPod forcefully from me, you refused to share this cinema popcorn that has being hungering since and the soft drink I love the most", I said within myself. Dea dea: "Today I will so disgrace you ehn, that you will look like a fool", I said as I looked at him with a smile and he looked at me smiling back with his mouth full of popcorn. Dea dea: "The idiot is even smiling, I will so show you fire ehn", I said within myself as I slowly pulled out the thin small-long plastic which I regularly use to cause commotion. As the movie continued, I slowly moved the plastic forward touching the lady who sat in front of him. The lady, thinking it was some insect, used her hand to make it flee. I stopped and continued, she then got really fed up by what was happening, so she turned back to see who was doing it. Immediately I saw her turning her head, I stopped and acted like I was being serious with the movie. She looked at Veron who was right at her back, Veron noticed that she was looking at him, so he looked at her and gave her a smile. She said nothing and turned back to the movie she was watching. As I saw that she was back to her movie watching, I continued my trouble, but this time, I poked her on her bum and waist. She got really angry this time and stood up, then looked angrily at Veron who was looking at her with a smile. She then gave him a dirty slap that caused his head to fall backwards. Lady: "[Angry] How dare you touch me, are you mad!?", she shouted angrily. I began to laugh heavily, as I raised the plastic stick up and moved slowly away from Veron. Veron looked at me and saw me laughing with the plastic stick in my hand. Veron: "Dea dea!!, so it was you that caused this, I will so kill you!!", he shouted then stood up and ran after me. I being a smart boy, I ran out side the hall and Veron ran after me very fast. He had almost caught me, when I noticed that he had almost grabbed my hand, I quickly stopped and bent down. He flu over me and fall to the ground with his knees and his legs apart. Immediately he fell, his trouser tore apart from the middle of his ass and displayed his black underwear. Dea dea: "[Laughs] See black Ipod in 3D ooo!!", I shouted laughing as I drew people's attention. Veron: "Dea dea!!! I will kill you!!...", he said standing up and running after me, with his torn trouser which was now like a separated piece of jeans........ To be continue. STORY BY DINDY AKA NNAMDI contact me on Whatsapp/Viber: 07087750433 Email: [email protected] or Email: [email protected] Facebook: Ossy andy Nnamdi Skype: 07087750433 or Skype: [email protected] Twitter: @nnamdiossy INSTAGRAM: @ossynnamdi
15 Nov 2016 | 17:05
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So funny.
15 Nov 2016 | 17:19
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hahahahhahahaha ayaf die oh
15 Nov 2016 | 17:26
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GRAND COMEDY HOUSE (STORY BY DINDY) EPISODE 3 Please do not share without talking to me personally and asking for permission, thank you for reading this story. That was crazy of me right? Well what can I say, I'm a crazy thing [laughs]. Veron didn't catch me, I'm too smart for him, he tried all he could but I keep jumping and changing my direction. The funny part was when he thought he had caught me, then I jumped into a moving bus and he fell inside a gutter [laughs]. Bad for him right? Well he deserved it, after all he did me wrong highly. The best part of it all for me, was that after that incident he started respecting me and feared me alot. Now I got him under my control, I'm a bad ass right?, Yes I am when pushed to be bad. I'm a good guy to be sincerely speaking, let me tell you how good of a person i am. There was a day........ .....STORY BEGINS..... Anita: "Dea dea, take this", she said to me. Dea dea: "Ah, but daddy said you should...", I said but couldn't finish my statement because she blocked me with her words. Anita: "Will you just shut up, naughty brat!", she shouted at me. Anita: "Take this clothes and go wash them", she said rudely as she gave me the pair of hard jeans to wash. Dea dea: " [complaining] oo I don't like this at all, daddy told you to wash it na", I said to her angrily. Anita: "Shut up, c'mon take it now!", she ordered me rudely. Dea dea: "ooo, you have started again o", I said to her as I took the hard jeans to wash them. Anita: "You better behave yourself and wash that jeans well or else I will give you a dirty slap", she said to me as I left where she was. Anita: "See this boy is becoming something else", she said. Anita: "I will so teach him a lesson if he ever tries any stupid thing with me", she said. .........THREE DAYS LATER........ Dad: "Dea dea!", called my dad. Dea dea: "Yes dad i'm here sir", I said as I stood right in front of him. Dad: "You told me that you wanted to buy new clothes right?", he asked me. Dea dea: "Yes dad", I said. Dea dea: "And I also need new shoes, nail cutter, make-up kit, rope, pet, chain the golden type", I said to my dad. Dad: "Are you mad?", said my dad. Dea dea: "No sir!,", I said to him. Dad: "Then why are you asking for all those things?", he asked me. Dea dea: "I want to use them for something", I said to him. Dad: "Dea dea, you have started with those your stupid tricks again right?", he asked. Dad: "See let me warn you, if you try anything stupid, I will kill you with my hands", he said looking deep into my eyes as he pointed at me. Dea dea: "Dad, I'm a changed person now, I have stopped all that", i said giving him a fake grin. Dad: "It better be true", he said. Dad: "I gave Anita some money to give you for the clothes", he said. Dea dea: "How much dad?", I asked. Dad: "3000", he said. Dea dea: "[Smiling] Thanks dad", I said happily. Dad: "I would be back this evening, so take care of Anita, remember your mum travelled with Veron, Sonie and Hassan went to see your aunt", he said to me. Dea dea: "But dad, it should be Anita that should take care of me, not the other way around", I said to my dad. Dad: "Shut up, don't you know you're the man, or are you now a lady?", he asked me as he moved out. Dea dea: "[talks in a low tone] Yes dad I'm a man, I mean your wife", I said. Dad: "Did you just call my wife?", he asked me standing close to the door. Dea dea: "Jesus, the wizard heard it," I said in my mind. Dea dea: "No oo, what I said was that your wife will miss you", I said giving a fake smile. Dad: "Dea dea take your time", he said Dad: "By the way, i would be back by 5pm", he said as he moved out. Dea: "ok dad", I said. ......FEW MINUTES LATER..... Dea dea: "Dad said he gave you money to give me", I said to Anita. Anita: "Yes any problem?", she asked me. Dea dea: "No problem, I just want to collect my money that's all", I said to her. Anita: "Why?", she asked. Dea dea: "Because I wanna buy a brain in the market", I replied her. Anita: "You better buy the brain because you seriously need it", she said to me. Anita: "Here take it", she said giving me the money. Dea dea: "Ah ahn, what is this?", I said. Anita: " It's money or have your brain expired?", she asked. Dea dea: "Dad said he gave you 3000 to give me", I said to her. Anita: "I don't know what you're saying, all I know is that, that's the money dad gave me to give you", she said. Dea dea: "Oh, I don't like this o", I said unhappily. Anita: "What!, I will slap you, c'mon get out of my sight!", she said as she pushed me away. Dea dea: "You're pushing me abi?", I asked smiling wickedly. Dea dea: "No problem, so dad gave you only 1000 to give me, no problem", I said. Anita: "Please please, go away from my sight", she said. Dea dea: "I will so show you today ehn", I said within myself, smiling out loud. Dea dea: "Ok, thank you", I said as I put the money in my back pocket and went to the market to buy things --you know the type of things na :) RIP SIS :D --. .......BY 4:30...... Dea dea: "Dad will soon be back and that small girl is sleeping", I said to myself. Dea dea: "I will so show her pepper ehn, she has the mind to take out of the money dad gave me", I said to myself. Dea dea: "Her cup has gotten to the top, she thinks she's smarter, always forcing me to wash dad's hard jeans", I said to myself. Dea dea: "Today she will hate herself, I promise", I said. I stood up from where I sat, then went to my room and brought out all the things I went to buy in the market. I did some mixers, then went to meet Anita where she was sleeping. Dea dea: "See as this idiot open mouth, you will drink pepper urine today", I said then placed a nylon filled with urine and black pepper on the hand she opened. I brought out my tiny long plastic, then looked at the time which was now on 5pm, I then moved it around her mouth for her to think it was a rat. In fear she threw her hand with the nylon, on her face. The nylon immediately busted. I fell on the floor, laughing like a mad dog, while She ran blindly spitting , to the bathroom to wash off my urine mixed with pepper from her mouth, eyes and face. When she was done, she came holding a knife. When she got inside the parlour where the incident occurred, I was on the floor with my knees, close to the front door. Dea dea: "I'm sorry for what I did, I was only angry please forgive me", I said with a sad face. Dea dea: "I know what I did was too much, please I want you to revenge", I said. Dea dea: "On the table, is a nylon filled with the same yours was filled with, take it and stone it on my forehead", I said as I stood up. She said nothing, then picked it up and smiled. Immediately she threw it, I quickly opened the door and it landed on my dad's forehead. I fell to the ground once more laughing knowing that my plan worked perfectly well. Anita stood in shock to what she saw and my dad stood in confusing as the pepper urine rushed down his face, while I laughed. Dea dea: "[Laughs] You fell for my tricks!", I said laughing aloud. My dad on hearing that looked at me with his eyes closed because of the pepper in the urine, then shouted "DEA DEA !!!!"........ To be continue. STORY BY DINDY AKA NNAMDI contact me on Whatsapp/Viber: 07087750433 Email: [email protected] or Email: [email protected] Facebook: Ossy andy Nnamdi Skype: 07087750433 or Skype: [email protected] Twitter: @nnamdiossy INSTAGRAM: @ossynnamdi
16 Nov 2016 | 17:45
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following keenly
17 Nov 2016 | 02:05
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lol,,,,if I was ur dad, I will so beat u......
17 Nov 2016 | 02:47
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ROFL
17 Nov 2016 | 03:53
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Lolz
17 Nov 2016 | 04:15
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Bad boy!
17 Nov 2016 | 06:24
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Lolss
17 Nov 2016 | 07:30
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Lol,ya Kum
17 Nov 2016 | 08:06
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Dat bo y is bad
17 Nov 2016 | 08:18
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deadae you are dead
17 Nov 2016 | 09:28
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Kikikikiki...
17 Nov 2016 | 15:34
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Hahaha
17 Nov 2016 | 16:05
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following
17 Nov 2016 | 16:43
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Hehehehe...Bad boi
17 Nov 2016 | 18:07
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Hahahahahahahhaahhaha...u 4 no talk like dat...u 4 pretend as if u no knw
17 Nov 2016 | 19:02
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Hahahahahahahahahahahaahahhahahahahahahahahahahaahhahaahhahahahaahhaahhahaaha....una no go kill person with laugh abeg
17 Nov 2016 | 19:08
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GRAND COMEDY HOUSE (STORY BY DINDY) EPISODE 4 Please do not share without talking to me personally and asking for permission, thank you for reading this story. [Laughs] I over did it and I was a good guy right? Well that was a lesson for her not to try me again, which she understood very well. I was punished that day, I swept the house and the compound three times, it was not easy, I had no choice but to obey because if I didn't the punishment would be more worst than that. Well I still got all the money from Anita because I explained to my dad why I did what I did. I sometimes win and loose other times, but never the less I always have fun with what I do and feel no regrets for doing them. I know some of you will think I'm nuts, but guess what? I'm nuts [Laughs]. I'm a psycho right? I'm insane right? I need a doctor right? I need help right?, what's your name? Right?. [laughs] I got you there, you just said your name is "right" ;) :D :p . Ok enough of my madness, let me tell you guys about another trick I pulled that got a massive impact. It was a lovely day, full of promises...... .....STORY BEGINS..... Dea dea: "Sonie, Sonie", I called my sis. Sonie: "What is it?, she asked. Dea dea: "Mum said you should add salt in the stew", I said to her. Sonie: "Why is mum disturbing me na", she said frowning. Sonie: "But she is there, why is she still calling me?", she asked. Dea dea: "Mum is not there that's why she sent me to call you", I said. Sonie: "ooo, mum won't let someone rest for just one minute", she said as she stood up from where she sat, heading to the kitchen. Dea dea: "Mum also said you should add enough salt because she forgot to add salt, when she was cooking", I said to her smiling. Sonie: "I've heard", she said as she left where I was and entered the kitchen. ....WHILE IN THE KITCHEN.... Sonie: "[Grumbling] I don't know why mum can't do this by herself before leaving the kitchen", she said as she picked up the salt can. Sonie: "She just want me to enter the kitchen", she said throwing salt into the hot boiling stew. Sonie: "I'm just tired of her troubles", she said keeping the can of salt back to its position. Sonie: "Everytime, Sonie do this, Sonie do that", she said as she picked up the big steel spoon. Sonie: "am I the only lady in this house?", she asked herself as she dipped the steel spoon into the stew. Sonie: "Anita is always doing nothing, only me, but yet mum will still complain that I'm too lazy when it comes to work", she said as she used the steel spoon to steer the pot of stew. Sonie: "One day I will just get annoyed and leave this house", she said removing the steel spoon from the pot of stew. Sonie: "And when I leave, I won't come back", she said as she left the kitchen without tasting the stew. .......FEW MINUTES LATER....... Mum enters the kitchen to check on what she cooked. Mum: "Ah, the stew must be ready by now", she said as she took a small towel to bring down the stew. Mum: "It smells so good", she said. Mum: "Sonie!", she called my sis. .....MEAN WHILE...... Dea dea: "Sonie mum is calling you", I said to Sonie who wasn't interested in what I said. Sonie: "Shut up, I didn't hear it", she said to me. Dea dea: "But didn't you hear her?", I asked. Sonie: "I said you should shut up, I'm not the only lady in the house", she said. Sonie: "After all Anita is not a man, she's a lady like me", she said. Dea dea: "ok, since that is the way you see it", I said smiling. Dea dea: "[Shouting] Sonie mum is calling you!!", I shouted so loud that everyone could hear my voice. Sonie: "[Angry] You're mad Dea dea", she said angrily. Mum: "[Shouts from the kitchen] come quickly Sonie!", shouted my mum. Sonie: "have you seen what you've caused, I will show you", she said snapping her fingers in front of me. Dea dea: "Mumu, we will see who will show who", I said within myself. ........BACK AT THE KITCHEN...... Mum: "My husband is gonna love this", she said as she dished the stew in a cooler. Sonie: "[Frowning] Mum you called me", she said as she approached mum. Mum: "What took you so long?", mum asked her as she continued what she was doing. Sonie: "I was busy", she said to mum still frowning. Mum: "Ok, help me take those plates to the dining table", she said to Sonia. Sonie: "Ok ma", she said as she took the plates. Mum: "When you're done with that, come back and take this coolers", she said to Sonie. Sonie: "Ok mum", she said frowning. ......FEW MINUTES LATER...... After the dining table was set, my mum called everyone to come down to the dining table, to eat their dinner. Everyone walked down to the dining table except me because I knew what was going to take place. Mum: "Where is Dea dea?", asked my mum. Hassan: "I'm sure he's in his room right now planning a trick", he said. Veron: "Yes sure, he is a little trickster", he said. Anita: "I better go call that little demon", she said. Dad: "Leave him, if he is hungry he would come here, you know how much he loves food", said my dad. Sonie: "You're right dad", she said. Dad: "Please honey dish out the food, let's eat", he said. ......MEAN WHILE..... As I heard them talking about me, I laughed heavily, knowing that they all were going to pay for every single word they said. Dea dea: "You guys should glow now", I said to myself smiling. Dea dea: "You guys are mocking me", I said. Dea dea: "Sonie, you wanted to show me? Now you will see who shows who", I said to myself. Dea dea: "[smiling wickedly] RIP tongues", I said. ......BACK AT THE DINING TABLE...... Hassan: "This food smells good", he said putting a full spoon of rice and stew into his mouth. Dad: "It's gonna taste really good", he said as the food entered his mouth. Anita: "For sure, mum cooked it", she said as food entered her mouth. Veron: "Mum is the best cook ever", he said putting the food in his mouth. Mum: [Smiling] Thanks dear", she said as she dished her food out and Sonie's own too. Immediately Hassan, dad, Anita and Veron started to chew the food, they all spat out at the same time. Dad: "Jesus!", he shouted as he spat like a pregnant woman. Veron: "No no no, what's this ooo, my teeth!", he shouted using water to wash it off. Anita: " My tongue o!", she shouted spitting out the remaining particles of the food in her mouth. Hassan: "Mum you cooked raw salt for us o!", he shouted as he poured back the rice which was in his mouth on the plate. Mum: "[Confused] Cooked salt?", she asked confused. Sonie: "[Confused ] How is it possible?", she asked. Dad: "Yes salt, Sonie taste it and see for yourself, chia my tongue oo", he said as he pulled out his tongue and used his fingers to scratch it. Sonie picked up her spoon and tasted of her unknown deeds. Sonie: "Jesussss, salt o!!!!", she shouted spitting out the food. Mum: "[More confused ] How is it possible, i only added a little salt before i left the kitchen", she said. Sonie: "Ehn mum, you added salt before you left the kitchen?, she asked mum. Mum: "Yes I did", she said. Sonie: [Puts her hand on her head] mummy is Dea Dea o, it is him oo", she said as her hand was on her head. Dad: "What did he do", he said as he used a handkerchief to clean his tongue. Sonie: "He told me that mum said I should add enough salt oo", she said. Mum: "Jesus!, I never said so o!", she said. Harran: "Sonie you have killed me oo", he said as he used the spoon to scratch his tongue. Veron: "I can't take this anymore", he said as he stood up and went to kitchen to wash off the salt. Anita: "Me too" she said following Veron at his back. Hassan: "Chia my tongue o", he said as he stood up pulling out his tongue and walking to the kitchen to wash it. Dad: "Woman, you see what your bast*rd son has done again?", he said still cleaning his tongue. Mum: "Yes your bastard of a son has done his tricks again", she said. Dad: [looks at my mum] see this woman o", he said. Mum: "[looks at my dad] I'm looking at her right now", she said. While they were there talking and complaining, I was there in my room laughing like a mad man because of the different types of shouts I heard. Suddenly my door opened with force and the figure that stood in front of me was my dad, with the pot of salty stew. He looked at me, then locked the door behind him. Dad: "Dea dea!, now sit-down very well", he said to me. Dea dea: "Yes sir", I respected myself because I knew I had no where to run to. Dad: "Now start licking this stew", he said angrily placing the pot of salty stew right in front of me. Dea dea: "Dad, can i have bread to wash it down?, I asked. Dad: "Shut up and lick that thing", he ordered. I had no where to run to, so I dipped my finger into the pot to have a taste of how it really taste like. Dea dea: "Chia oo I'm dead oo", I said within me as i squeezed my face and tears ran down my eyes because of the excessive salt. Dad: "My friend will you lick that stew finish", he said as he gave me a heavy knock on my head". Dea dea: "[Crying] Ok sir", I said. My brain started breathing because of the knocked my dad gave me, I looked at him once more as I dipped my hand into the pot of salty stew. I looked at my dad and looked at the pot of salty stew, which i was about to lick. When suddenly I fainted........ To be continue. STORY BY DINDY AKA NNAMDI contact me on Whatsapp/Viber: 07087750433 Email: [email protected] or Email: [email protected] Facebook: Ossy andy Nnamdi Skype: 07087750433 or Skype: [email protected] Twitter: @nnamdiossy INSTAGRAM: @ossynnamdi
18 Nov 2016 | 17:15
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lolz when you wake up, you go still lick am oh
18 Nov 2016 | 19:36
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lol@Bluestarry
18 Nov 2016 | 23:17
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hmm
19 Nov 2016 | 03:13
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Na dat pot of soup dey suppose pour 4 head to take wake u up
19 Nov 2016 | 03:31
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Chai! Lot Of Lolz
19 Nov 2016 | 04:32
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HahahahAhaha. Dea dea the trickster. ur papa go hammer u today
19 Nov 2016 | 04:45
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So so funny!
19 Nov 2016 | 04:48
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Hahaha! so hilarious
19 Nov 2016 | 05:52
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lwkmd
19 Nov 2016 | 05:56
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serves ypu right
19 Nov 2016 | 06:29
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Lolzzzzz
19 Nov 2016 | 07:33
0 Likes
Hahahaha...can't stop laughing
19 Nov 2016 | 07:40
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Can't stop laughing
19 Nov 2016 | 07:57
0 Likes
Lolz
19 Nov 2016 | 12:52
0 Likes
funny
19 Nov 2016 | 13:00
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Hohohohohohohoho....u no plan dis one well nah
19 Nov 2016 | 15:27
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lol @bhorllyqueen @Dee @Harkeem1
20 Nov 2016 | 03:10
0 Likes
GRAND COMEDY HOUSE (STORY BY DINDY) LAST EPISODE 5 Please do not share without talking to me personally and asking for permission, thank you for reading this story. I deserved that right? Well I know I over did it, but I was pushed to it, my mum and sis annoyed me that day, so my anger lifted for revenge. I actually ended up eating that stew with the rice, although it wasn't that same day, but I ate up all the stew and the meat in it. My dad is not a kind of person you joke with, when he says you are gonna do something, nothing will change his mind back. No matter the amount of plead you plead, he won't change his mind. I really suffered, tasting my own tricks and hand destruction. I guess I paid for my tricks. Well that didn't make me stop at all, I kept on playing my tricks. I became the trick lord of the house, no one could compete with me because I was too tricky. It got to a point when my dad could not take it anymore because he was totally frustrated and tired of a son like me. He even went as far as saying I needed deliverance because I acted like someone with spiritual illness, but be sincere, do I act like a mad person reading like you? I got you again! :D, you fell for my tricks :D :D [laughs uncontrollably]. Yea yea, I know I'm insane, but what can a potential mad guy like I do? Go more mad?, well I guess yes! :D. Believe me guys this part I'm about to tell you will make you so love me, but hi don't fall too deep in love with me because I might just be tricking you again :D. Now enough of that, let me tell you how it all happened. It happened......... ........STORY BEGINS....... Dad: "[Angry] Dea dea I will kill you!!", screamed my dad as I escaped his presence. Mum: "What is it again?", asked my mum as she entered the room my dad was in. Dad: "Move out of my way, let me kill that boy", said my dad as he tried passing my mum. Mum: "Wait, please don't kill him", she pleaded as she held him back. Dad: "Oh!, let me go", said my dad trying to free himself. Mum: "No, tell me what happened", said my mum still holding my dad. Dad: "Ok you want to know what happened right?", asked my dad. Mum: "Yes please tell me", she said as she left hold of him. Dad: "Now smell my hand", he said. Mum: "[Smells it] Jesus!", she shouted in disgust as she spat like a pregnant woman. Mum: "What is that awful smell?", she asked. Dad: "That smell is a fowl's excrete and your so called son made me dip my hand into it", he said. Mum: "Jesus Christ!, Dea dea that boy won't kill me", she said. Dad: "Thank God you see things my way, now excuse me let me go kill him before he kills both of us", he said as he tried passing my mum. Mum: "No wait, if you kill him, people will say things and you will be jailed", she said blocking him. Dad: "You're right, lets just poison him so that he would die silently, no one would suspect that way", he said. Mum: "Stop that, just wait and listen to me", she said. Dad: "Ok, but just know that your son has a spiritual illnesses and the only cure is death", he said. Mum: "That is what I suspect also, but death is not the cure", she said. Dad: "Then what is?", asked my dad. Mum: "Let's bring a strong pastor here that would cure him of this illness", said my mum. Dad: "Are you sure that would work?", he asked. Mum: "Yes I am, we need to find a solution to his problems before it gets worst, he might even go mad with this character of his", she said. Dad: "I won't mind if he goes crazy, at least people won't think I killed him", he said. Mum: "Stop it, he is still your son you know", she said. Dad: "The last time I checked, that boy was not in my plans", he said. Mum: "You better stop that", she said. Dad: "Fine, I have heard", said my dad. Mum: "I will call the pastor to come tomorrow", she said. Dad: "Ok, lucky him you are around if not, I would have kill him today", he said as he walked passed my mum. Mum: "It's ok ah, please pass quickly don't touch me with that your chicken a*s hand [Laughs]", said my mum as she laughed hard. Immediately I saw my dad making his way out the room, I took off like the speed of light to a corner to hide. When I got to the corner, I began to back flash on what my parents were discussing about me. Dea dea: "So these people think I have spiritual problems and they want to bring a pastor", I said to myself. Dea dea: "So dad has the mind to say I'm not amongst his family plans, he even wished me madness", I said to myself. Dea dea: "Ok no problem, let them bring the pastor", I said to myself. Dea dea: "I will so show that pastor fire", I said to myself as I took a peak to check whether the place was clear for me to move out. I saw no one around, so I made a run for it and went out to gather my plans together for the next day. .........THE NEXT DAY......... Dad: "When will the pastor come?", asked my dad. Mum: "He said we should give him two hours, that he would be here. Dad: "Please let him come fast because I'm becoming impatient", he said. Mum: "Impatient? Are you still thinking of killing your son?", she asked. Dad: "I am not thinking, I have planned it", he said. Mum: "What is wrong with you, why do you want the blood of your son on your hands?", she questioned him. Dad: "like I told you yesterday, the only way to free your son off his spiritual illness is to kill him", said my dad. Mum: "Please dear, kill that thought, he is our son", she said. Dad: "Point of correction, he is your son, when he dies then he becomes ours, I can't have a possessed human as my child", he said. Mum: "It's ok, the pastor will come soon", she said. .......MEAN WHILE........ I was out side my parent's room ear dropping on what they were talking about, to know when the pastor would arrive. Dea dea: "So this man really wants me dead", I said to myself standing close to my parent's room. Dea dea: "No problem, the pastor will be here in two hours", I said to myself. Dea dea: "That is just great, in fact wonderfully awesome", I said smiling to myself, as I left their and went to my room to get ready for what was going to take place. .....2 HOURS LATER..... Anita: Someone is knocking at the gate", she said. Sonie: "Let me go check who it is", she said as she walked out side to check who was knocking on the gate. When she got there, she found the pastor Standing, then she let him in because mum had inform them of the pastor's arrival. When Sonie and the pastor came in, everyone one was already there waiting for the pastor except me, i was still in my room. Pastor: "Peace be unto this family", he said as he dropped bits of the anointed oil he held. Everyone: "Amen", said everyone. Pastor: "Where is Dea dea, the lord told me things about him", he said. Hassan: "He is in his room, let me go call him", he said. Pastor: "No don't go there", he said. Pastor: "I would go myself", he said. Pastor: "What you guys should do right now is to start praying because the spirit controlling him is a stubborn one", he said. Mum: "Ok pastor", she said as she told my dad and my sibling to hold hands together. Pastor: "No matter what happens don't stop praying", he said. Everyone: "Ok sir", they said. Pastor: "You may start now, let me goto his room", he said as he left to my room which was shown to him by my dad. When he got to my room, he saw me sitting on my bed with my legs crossed and my back was what he could see. My entire body was pure white. Pastor: "la ka ka ka sa ba kas", he spoke in tongues. Pastor: "You evil stubborn spirit, I command you to leave in the name of Jesus!", he said as he dropped bits of the anointed oil in his hand on my body. Dea dea: "uhn uhn", I moved my body like I was being flogged with a painful Cain. Pastor: "Lo kakaka zuka, I said leave!", he said dropping bits of anointing oil on my back. Dea dea: "uhn uhn, hahaha", I started laughing, then took the knife I kept beside me and stabbed my bed continuously to the extent that the foam inside it started jumping out. Pastor: "Go go go!!, in the name of Jesus", he said. I stood up standing on my bed, then I looked at him with my eyes which were pure red. Dea dea: "Blood, blood, give me your blood", I said looking at him like a zombie demon, with the knife pointing at him and my mouth filled with red paint. Pastor: "You don't scare me you spirit, I say leave this body in the name of Jesus", he said. Dea dea: "I need your blood!", I said then jumped off my bed with the knife and miss stabbed his neck, then placed my teeth on his neck. Pastor: "Jesus Christ!!", he shouted in fear as he bent his head and crawled out my room, then made a run for his life. Pastor: "The devil is alive, the devil is alive", he ran straight to the parlour screaming with his red neck, making everyone in the parlour to reduce the speed at which they prayed. Hassan: "[Opens an eye] huh what I'm I hearing?, he asked. Mum: "[Eyes closed] close your mouth and pray", she said. Pastor: "The devil needs blood oo", he said as he ran out side the house. Mum: "Don't stop praying, remember what the pastor said", she said encouraging them not to stop. Dea dea: "Blood, taste for blood", I said as i walked out my room with the knife above my head and my mouth dropping of red paint. The prayer quickly ended and everyone looked at me. Hassan: "Jesus Christ!", he said as he quickly took off following the pastor behind. Sonie: "Pastor wait for me too, I left my life at the gate", she said taking off quicker than Hassan. Mum: "Anita where is Veron, we need to stay together and pray harder", she said. Anita: "Veron left when Sonie was still talking", she said moving backwards. Mum: "Why are you going close to the door?", she asked. Anita: "I think I forgot my life too at the gate, I better go.... Jesus he is already too close", she said as she took off quickly. Only my dad and mum were there looking at me in fear, I then stopped. Dea dea: "Your blood is mine for the pleasure of my desire", I said pointing the knife to my dad. Mum: "[Afraid] Thank God it's your blood he wants, let me go check on the kids whether they've found their lives", she said as she ran out side. Dad: "Honey, don't leave me here", he spoke in fear looking at the direction my mum ran. Dad: "See, I'm not afraid of you", he said looking at me shaking like a fish as he adjusted backwards. Dea dea: "I will drink your blood", I said walking closer to him. Dad: "Jesus Christ, your eyes are extremely red", he said in fear. Dea dea: "I need blood!", i shouted as I jumped on the sofa he was close to and pointed my knife in his face. Dad: "[Extremely afraid] Jesus ooo!", he screamed like a lady and ran out side towards the gate. Dea dea: "Come here I need your blood!", I shouted as I ran after him wearing only my boxers and my entire body painted pure white, with red paint coming out my mouth. Dad: "Don't lock the gate!", he shouted for my mum who was about to lock the gate form the out side. Dad: "Dea dea wants to kill me o, Dea dea wants my blood o, I'm too young to die!", he shouted in fear as he got close to the door and I got close to him.... ........STORY ENDS....... [Laughs] That was crazy right?, I'm totally the king of tricks right?, well I can't say because I'm still wearing my zombie demon look right now and they believe that I'm not a human any more. They are out side the gate as I speak right now, the best part is that the pastor left his shoe, bible and anointing oil in the house [Laughs]. Maybe I should tell them it was a trick or maybe I should enjoy this while it last :D. Wait I think someone is knocking on the gate, I better go get the cutlass in the kitchen, that would make me more scary :D, good bye guys, I have people to scare :D :D. THE END UP COMING STORIES FOR THIS MONTH 1). THE BUS. 2). TRUE LIFE STORY OF CHARLES THE SISI BOY. 3). THE WHITE STALLION. UP COMING STORIES FOR NEXT MONTH 1). OREGUN BOYS. 2). THE LONE WOLF (TRUE LIFE STORY OF DINDY'S LOVE LIFE). 3). GEAR. 4). THE ADVENTURE OF C.P.M YOUTH CAMP. MUCH LOVE FROM DINDY STORY BY DINDY AKA NNAMDI contact me on Whatsapp/Viber: 07087750433 Email: [email protected] or Email: [email protected] Facebook: Ossy andy Nnamdi Skype: 07087750433 or Skype: [email protected] Twitter: @nnamdiossy INSTAGRAM: @ossynnamdi
21 Nov 2016 | 17:51
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?????? Dea Dea is just something else
22 Nov 2016 | 03:26
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Crazy, I Cant Stop Laffing
22 Nov 2016 | 03:42
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Hahahaha
22 Nov 2016 | 03:51
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nice story
22 Nov 2016 | 04:49
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Kikikikikikiki Can't stop laughing
22 Nov 2016 | 05:15
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Crazy
22 Nov 2016 | 05:41
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Hahaha!!!
22 Nov 2016 | 07:07
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Hahahahahahahahahah....I can't stop laughing... . . nyc 1
22 Nov 2016 | 08:31
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Lol. This is crazy
22 Nov 2016 | 09:04
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haha ur craze no b here
22 Nov 2016 | 09:34
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wow
22 Nov 2016 | 09:41
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Funny but seriously if na my parent na almighty slap go wake u from dat ur silly tricks
22 Nov 2016 | 11:55
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Thumbs up dude.
22 Nov 2016 | 14:00
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I still dey for ground till now the laugh that pastor na fake if not him for know say notin possess that guy but dae dae your own too much o
22 Nov 2016 | 14:02
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Very funny
22 Nov 2016 | 15:17
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I was just smiling as I read the end of this story.... Nice story... Thumbs up
23 Nov 2016 | 04:33
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lolz
23 Nov 2016 | 07:36
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lol@jummybabe
23 Nov 2016 | 15:09
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thanks alot@FroshDUDE
23 Nov 2016 | 15:10
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thanks@olayintan
23 Nov 2016 | 15:11
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thanks guys
23 Nov 2016 | 15:11
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You're welc0me!
23 Nov 2016 | 16:12
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You’re welcome bro
24 Nov 2016 | 13:34
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lol....@Adun.... na you be boss o
25 Nov 2016 | 16:19
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