INSOMNIA CHAPTER 1

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CHAPTER 2 I writhed and turned a lot as I slept. I was asleep, I think I knew that, but I couldn't see anything. It felt weird, the sleep, no images just a blank space as though I had a black cloth wrapped tightly around my face. And then there's that headache; it felt like, with each breath, a hammer was been lowered on my head and then stepped on. I woke up gasping, sweat pouring over my body. I looked around; I was in my bedroom with no memory, whatsoever, of how I got here. I stood still, listening, thinking What was I missing–and then, oh, no, she's gone. I buried my head in my palm, not weeping, just moaning painfully. I think my sounds attracted Mother because she was in the room in moments. *snap* She turned on the lights and I winced. I looked up at Mother, I could tell she'd been crying, but I had the feeling she was crying for me, her son, losing a loved one at such an age. Something she was all so familiar with; when Father died. "Look at your body, you are sweating so much," She said, her voice choked with concern. I shifted my gaze between Mother and my soaked shirt, saying nothing. "Take off your shirt." She said, helping me out of my shirt–it was my childhood all over again. She dumped the drenched shirt in the laundry hamper, and switched on the fan. I relaxed as I felt the cool breeze stir around the room, Angela hated sleeping with the fan on. I became restless, squirming where I was. How exactly does one deal with a loss?.. I made a mental note to find such book. I still hadn't uttered a word. Mother was watching me intently, obviously worried. This wasn't her lively boy. I could read the expression on her face, so I thought, let me do us both some good, and I tried to stand on my feet. One moment I was scrambling awkwardly on my feet, the next I was down on my knees, my head falling off..damned headache, and my back hurt, what the hell?. I really need to get that book. Mother let out a short gasp and reached for me. I think I smiled. I sure am handling this perfectly, I thought wryly. Mother smiled too, a faint smile, an I-understand-how-you- feel smile. Love you Mom. "Sit still let me get you some drugs." She helped me to my feet and sat me on a couch by the wall. She came back a minute later with two caplets of acetaminophen and a glass of water. I stared at the drugs in my hand, surely she doesn't expect me to take this. "Take it!" Mother snapped. I was behaving like a big baby. The drugs helped. I managed to stand without tripping, and the hammer in my head had changed to soft pillows. There was still a throbbing, though. **** It was a dark day for me, the day of the funeral, and it was not because it rained– alot by the way– but simply because my life was over. I had now taken a new title; widower. Mother, bless her, handled the funeral preparations. Planning a funeral, to me, simply meant accepting that my wife was really gone. Maybe this was all a dream, like those dreams that seem so real, and seem to last forever and then you wake up from it. Yeah–this could all be a dream, a really bad dream. But, why then was I in a black suit, surrounded by vaguely familiar faces, listening to Rev.Simon(Mother's Reverend) who was going on and on about life after death, and a better place and the pain ultimately going away? Shows what he knows, I scoffed. This was as real as it gets. She's in there, I thought looking at the brown Casket on the ground. Is she? I bowed my head, my left hand in my pocket, and my right hand adjusting the dark sunglasses over my eyes(Mother's idea). I was trying to look strong, and failing at it. I think I heard my name. I turned, fifty or so pair of eyes glued to me. They wanted me to say something, but I hadn't the faintest idea what. Mother came to my rescue. "Do you want to say a few words, honey?" She asked. I looked up at her, and then the memories. " ..aw..that's so pitiful. Will, if I ever die please don't go crying and throwing earth on my casket, or saying all those pathetic last words." We both had a good laugh about that. Now it's real. "No." I said, and turned away. She wasn't dead, so why should I go saying last words? I didn't watch when her body was lowered into the earth. I was suddenly angry at the world, at life, why should she have gone? she was so young, so good. I looked up into the sky; you're supposed to be fair, to be just. But that's all fad, isn't it? A just God my foot, I spat. I walked over to where my little girl, who was confused at why all those people were crying, sat with some relations and I carried her. I damn well yanked her out of the hands of some second cousin I'd never met before. She was mine, my own. No one has the right to take her, not even death– oh she looked so much like her mother. Everyone at the funeral kept their eyes locked on me as I held on to my daughter tightly, she was all I had left. I was really the picture of a grieving husband, but not the typical one. I might as well have gone nuts with the way they stared at me. I placed her on her feet and, holding her hands, led her to the car. I didn't cry that day. I didn't have to. Somewhere, deep in my mind, I felt that going through those charades– crying, and last words– meant I'd really lost her. I wasn't ready to accept that just yet. I was wound that tight. Amy looked at me and asked: "Daddy, did mommy go to heaven?" I felt my heart squeeze and then shatter. "Yes baby, she's in heaven now." I looked up, I hope. "Why did she go, Is she mad at us?, Can I go with her?" "No! I–uh–I mean No sweetie," I said, shocked at my own voice, "You'll stay herevwith me, won't you ?"—I was sincerely scared. She nodded, " Yes Daddy, but I'll miss mommy. But, I'm glad you're still here with me." " Me too." **** THE WEATHER was getting increasingly bad, I drove slowly, thinking of the future. I looked at Amy as she slept peacefully in the back seat and I made up my mind never to let her go through such pain as I did. I just didn't know how I planned to do it. I drove the car into the compound and parked under a shade of trees. I sat still, motionless, deep in thoughts. The compound was full of people, sympathizers. I hated those. I must have received about a hundred hugs and handshakes. Everyone I knew was there, and then there was the people that I didn't even know(they seemed to grieve the hardest). Even the guys at the office, I was touched. Felix, my best friend and partner at the office was waiting for me. We'd been best friends since Fresh man year at the University College. He had known my wife almost as much as I did. He walked over to my car and opened the door, he looked genuinely concerned, what with me storming out of the funeral. I could see real pain in his face, unlike those mock sympathizers out there. "How' you handling this, brother?," He asked as he literally pulled me out of the car. He really shouldn't have asked. I looked shaken up. I shrugged my shoulders, and opened the back door to get my daughter. "I'll be fine"–I said. I didn't believe that. Felix looked at me and could tell that I wouldn't be fine for at least another couple of months. "I could arrange a leave for you at work you know, I'll put in a word for you" "No!" –I nearly yelled, and then smiled, "I'll be just fine, I don't need a leave right now." I really didn't know what I'd do with myself in the months to come, so a leave for me was definitely not an option, I needed the distraction of work. "Are you sure?" I sighed, "Yes." A lady walked up to me and took the sleeping child from my arms, that was relieving–I hadn't really realized how big my girl had grown. I looked up at the sky, the clouds were dark and heavy with precipitation; it would rain any moment now, something I would have enjoyed normally, but now the thought of falling water made me depressed. "Goodbye for now, you'll always be in here."– I said, touching my chest. God, I was cheesy, but I meant it. Felix, who had been watching me almost near the point of tears, thought alarmingly of the way I stared blankly at the sky without blinking. Didn't heavy grievers have a high suicide rate? He shivered as the thought ran through his mind. No, I won't let that happen, I'll make sure I'm around him as often as I can. "How about a drink?"– He asked me, "Sure, I could use one"–I said. To BE CONTINUED

chapter two I writhed and turned a lot as I slept. I was asleep, I think I knew that, but I couldn't see anything. It felt weird, the sleep, no images just a blank space as though I had a black cloth wrapped tightly around my face. And then there's that headache; it felt like, with each breath, a hammer was been lowered on my head and then stepped on. I woke up gasping, sweat pouring over my body. I looked around; I was in my bedroom with no memory, whatsoever, of how I got here. I stood still, listening, thinking What was I missing–and then, oh, no, she's gone. I buried my head in my palm, not weeping, just moaning painfully. I think my sounds attracted Mother because she was in the room in moments. *snap* She turned on the lights and I winced. I looked up at Mother, I could tell she'd been crying, but I had the feeling she was crying for me, her son, losing a loved one at such an age. Something she was all so familiar with; when Father died. "Look at your body, you are sweating so much," She said, her voice choked with concern. I shifted my gaze between Mother and my soaked shirt, saying nothing. "Take off your shirt." She said, helping me out of my shirt–it was my childhood all over again. She dumped the drenched shirt in the laundry hamper, and switched on the fan. I relaxed as I felt the cool breeze stir around the room, Angela hated sleeping with the fan on. I became restless, squirming where I was. How exactly does one deal with a loss?.. I made a mental note to find such book. I still hadn't uttered a word. Mother was watching me intently, obviously worried. This wasn't her lively boy. I could read the expression on her face, so I thought, let me do us both some good, and I tried to stand on my feet. One moment I was scrambling awkwardly on my feet, the next I was down on my knees, my head falling off..damned headache, and my back hurt, what the hell?. I really need to get that book. Mother let out a short gasp and reached for me. I think I smiled. I sure am handling this perfectly, I thought wryly. Mother smiled too, a faint smile, an I-understand-how-you- feel smile. Love you Mom. "Sit still let me get you some drugs." She helped me to my feet and sat me on a couch by the wall. She came back a minute later with two caplets of acetaminophen and a glass of water. I stared at the drugs in my hand, surely she doesn't expect me to take this. "Take it!" Mother snapped. I was behaving like a big baby. The drugs helped. I managed to stand without tripping, and the hammer in my head had changed to soft pillows. There was still a throbbing, though. **** It was a dark day for me, the day of the funeral, and it was not because it rained– alot by the way– but simply because my life was over. I had now taken a new title; widower. Mother, bless her, handled the funeral preparations. Planning a funeral, to me, simply meant accepting that my wife was really gone. Maybe this was all a dream, like those dreams that seem so real, and seem to last forever and then you wake up from it. Yeah–this could all be a dream, a really bad dream. But, why then was I in a black suit, surrounded by vaguely familiar faces, listening to Rev.Simon(Mother's Reverend) who was going on and on about life after death, and a better place and the pain ultimately going away? Shows what he knows, I scoffed. This was as real as it gets. She's in there, I thought looking at the brown Casket on the ground. Is she? I bowed my head, my left hand in my pocket, and my right hand adjusting the dark sunglasses over my eyes(Mother's idea). I was trying to look strong, and failing at it. I think I heard my name. I turned, fifty or so pair of eyes glued to me. They wanted me to say something, but I hadn't the faintest idea what. Mother came to my rescue. "Do you want to say a few words, honey?" She asked. I looked up at her, and then the memories. " ..aw..that's so pitiful. Will, if I ever die please don't go crying and throwing earth on my casket, or saying all those pathetic last words." We both had a good laugh about that. Now it's real. "No." I said, and turned away. She wasn't dead, so why should I go saying last words? I didn't watch when her body was lowered into the earth. I was suddenly angry at the world, at life, why should she have gone? she was so young, so good. I looked up into the sky; you're supposed to be fair, to be just. But that's all fad, isn't it? A just God my foot, I spat. I walked over to where my little girl, who was confused at why all those people were crying, sat with some relations and I carried her. I damn well yanked her out of the hands of some second cousin I'd never met before. She was mine, my own. No one has the right to take her, not even death– oh she looked so much like her mother. Everyone at the funeral kept their eyes locked on me as I held on to my daughter tightly, she was all I had left. I was really the picture of a grieving husband, but not the typical one. I might as well have gone nuts with the way they stared at me. I placed her on her feet and, holding her hands, led her to the car. I didn't cry that day. I didn't have to. Somewhere, deep in my mind, I felt that going through those charades– crying, and last words– meant I'd really lost her. I wasn't ready to accept that just yet. I was wound that tight. Amy looked at me and asked: "Daddy, did mommy go to heaven?" I felt my heart squeeze and then shatter. "Yes baby, she's in heaven now." I looked up, I hope. "Why did she go, Is she mad at us?, Can I go with her?" "No! I–uh–I mean No sweetie," I said, shocked at my own voice, "You'll stay herevwith me, won't you ?"—I was sincerely scared. She nodded, " Yes Daddy, but I'll miss mommy. But, I'm glad you're still here with me." " Me too." **** THE WEATHER was getting increasingly bad, I drove slowly, thinking of the future. I looked at Amy as she slept peacefully in the back seat and I made up my mind never to let her go through such pain as I did. I just didn't know how I planned to do it. I drove the car into the compound and parked under a shade of trees. I sat still, motionless, deep in thoughts. The compound was full of people, sympathizers. I hated those. I must have received about a hundred hugs and handshakes. Everyone I knew was there, and then there was the people that I didn't even know(they seemed to grieve the hardest). Even the guys at the office, I was touched. Felix, my best friend and partner at the office was waiting for me. We'd been best friends since Fresh man year at the University College. He had known my wife almost as much as I did. He walked over to my car and opened the door, he looked genuinely concerned, what with me storming out of the funeral. I could see real pain in his face, unlike those mock sympathizers out there. "How' you handling this, brother?," He asked as he literally pulled me out of the car. He really shouldn't have asked. I looked shaken up. I shrugged my shoulders, and opened the back door to get my daughter. "I'll be fine"–I said. I didn't believe that. Felix looked at me and could tell that I wouldn't be fine for at least another couple of months. "I could arrange a leave for you at work you know, I'll put in a word for you" "No!" –I nearly yelled, and then smiled, "I'll be just fine, I don't need a leave right now." I really didn't know what I'd do with myself in the months to come, so a leave for me was definitely not an option, I needed the distraction of work. "Are you sure?" I sighed, "Yes." A lady walked up to me and took the sleeping child from my arms, that was relieving–I hadn't really realized how big my girl had grown. I looked up at the sky, the clouds were dark and heavy with precipitation; it would rain any moment now, something I would have enjoyed normally, but now the thought of falling water made me depressed. "Goodbye for now, you'll always be in here."– I said, touching my chest. God, I was cheesy, but I meant it. Felix, who had been watching me almost near the point of tears, thought alarmingly of the way I stared blankly at the sky without blinking. Didn't heavy grievers have a high suicide rate? He shivered as the thought ran through his mind. No, I won't let that happen, I'll make sure I'm around him as often as I can. "How about a drink?"– He asked me, "Sure, I could use one"–I said.

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insomnia CHAPTER THREE TWO MONTHS LATER I opened my eyes and saw that I was on my bed. I sighed and then I placed my hand over to my side as I've always done . I felt her, she was there, I smiled. It had all been a bad dream afterall. She suddenly sat up. I looked at her; she looked so pretty in her dazzling white night gown. " I thought you've gone forever?", I asked her. Hoping to God that she'd reply. She didn't. Instead, she got up from the bed. "Please, don't leave"—I said anxiously, trying to get up but failing, She started walking, not looking at me, and not saying a word. I stretched my hand to grab her but she was gone. I woke up with a start, sweat pouring out of my body ,It had been a dream. Damn it! But the nightmare, to me, was not the dream, but the fact that life as I knew it, had ended. I looked at the alarm clock: 3.09 a.m. What an odd hour. I got up from the bed, no bother trying to sleep, because I knew it would be pointless. The house felt different, chilly and empty. I felt a bit scared, knowing I was alone. Amy had been taken to my Mother's house. Mother had told me that I was in no shape to take care of her at the moment, but who was to take care of me? I picked up my phone and called up Felix's number, after a moments hesitation, I dialled. I placed it over my ear, I could hear the faint ringing and then the line clicked. " hello, Will?–is everything alright?" He sounded anxious. I rolled my eyes, so now I was the helpless baby. I might as well play the part fully. "I'm sorry for calling this early, but–I–uh–I had a bad dream." I pause and rub my chin, " do you think you could come over? I don't think I can sleep, and I could use the company."—I sounded like a 10 year old. I could hear him hesitating. "You don't have to come if you do not want to," I said. "No, no. I'll come right over. Anything for you buddy. Gloria will just have to wait. I'll just grab my work clothes." "Who's Gloria?" I ask, knowing what the answer would be. He lowers his voice, "She's the latest to hold my heart. I think she might be the one." I could hear him snigger. The one to what, stay two months, three months tops? I didn't even bother to ask. "Thank you," I said and hung up. I stood still for a while, and then dialled Mother. She was less enthusiastic talking to me, and she reminded me that it was past 3 a.m and honest folks were sleeping, "but I wanted to hear Amy's voice," I whine. "At 3a.m?" She snapped. I could only speak to Amy when it was dawn, she had said. And that had ended that. What was I expecting? **** When Felix arrived at my place, at thirty minutes past 3, we didn't stay up chatting or even drinking, No, instead I fell asleep. I think the presence of another, living, person made me feel relaxed. That, of course, could not have been said of my pal, Felix. He sat in my couch, stewing for a while. I'd erased the prospect of a potential morning 'work out'(his exact words), whatever that meant. I guess he later understood. **** "Look at us, just like the old bachelor days huh?" Felix said trying to lighten the mood, as he was buttoning his shirt sleeve. "You've always been a bachelor," I told him, trying not to think too much of the old days. "And–forgive me– at the rate you're going, will be a bachelor for ever." He frowned a little, thought for a while and then laughed boisterously. "I just haven't found the ONE yet." "What of uh–Gloria?" The one he mentioned not 3 hours ago. "She's a nice catch. But, come on, Will, you and I know how it always ends." He smiled, his carefree smile. I nod absentmindedly. To be without a care in the world. I didn't envy him. "You'll be alright, I am very sure of that," He said as he patted my shoulders. I stared blankly at the criss-cross blue and white pattern on my neck tie, and then shook my head. "That makes one of us," I said. Felix placed a box of cereal on the table, and then looked at me. That worry on his face. I wonder when they'll begin to look at me without seeing a helpless person. I wonder. "Are you really sure you want to head right back to work?" "I don't see why not." "I do." I stare at him, all hard eyes and serious-faced, "What do you know?" "You're my friend, and–" I cut him short, "Oh–yes–and have you ever lost someone so dear before?" My voice just got a few octaves higher. "Well–I–uh," I interrupt again, "All you ever do is change girls, you'll never know," I was just blurting out words. Felix just stared at me, wild eyes and surprised. Then confused, and then angry. "Who called to wake me at three in the morning?" "I didn't–" It was his turn to interrupt me, "I left my house, and Gloria, to help you and here you transfer some sort of anger on me?" I was as confused as he was. Really. "I'm sorry." I say, "I just don't want to sit at home doing nothing. It'll keep reminding me of– I pause– her." Felix sighed, and then his face softened. He must have felt guilty or something, I was the grieving one afterall. He was silent, searching for the right words. The room was silent with the tension of two grown men, friends, bickering in confusion. "Let's eat breakfast, and go to work, okay?" "Okay." I say. Vowing to myself to drop this grieving act, and try to move on as soon as possible. Although, it was one of those promises you make, in the heat of a moment, that needs extra effort to be achieved. Felix volunteered to drive, besides he wanted to drop by and check on Gloria. I locked the door, and then stood back to observe. Normally, I would always hurriedly eat my breakfast, kiss Angela ,tickle Amy and then dart out of the house. Now, I was the one locking up; weird. The changes I wasn't sure I could live with. **** I'd just gotten admission into college the year I met Angela. It was also the same year I'd met Felix, actually I met them both on the same day. I was this hot-head youth with a nagging desire to change the system, so I joined the Student's Union. It was the period of the semester examinations, and as usual, freshmen were edgy and nervous. It was a Thursday on a cool July afternoon. A perfect day to stage a 'peaceful' protest, the union had decided. The fees had become outrageous, the library was in a sorry state(not that any one cared), and student living expenses just got high. Somebody up there was not doing their jobs, so we decided to protest and give an ultimatum, after which we'd strike if our needs weren't meant. It was a sweet plan, and we cheered as the president sat down. But things don't always go according to plan, do they? Armed with placards and megaphones, we matched around yelling complaints, and our threats. The union president was leading the charge, yelling into the megaphone he gripped tightly in his glistening, dark hands. His name was Christopher. I was in forefront that day, behind Christopher. I was young and fearless, edging Christopher on, shouting even louder than the guy with the megaphone. I judged any one feeble, who wasn't generating much noise. I even grabbed a megaphone from a guy who didn't seem to be using it. I was in the front, so I had no idea that people had starting to 'discharge' from the back. Even Christopher understood what was happening before me. Apparently the school had a zero tolerance for protests. Any form at all. The commotion started from behind, and those of us in front, chanting and marching, were oblivious of the now scrambling students. Placard in my left hand, megaphone in my right, I was shouting: "No education, No life," "No money, no educati..." I didn't finish that particular statement when I felt someone grab my hand and say in pidgin: "Oboi, you no go move?" It was then it dawned on me: Christopher has disappeared, our so called 'tight' formation had broken down. I was the only one not running. The hand again grabbed me, but this time a female voice: "Move!" There was that unmistakable urgency in the voice, and so before I could absorb the situation, my legs were already running. I kept running, following the ones who had grabbed me. We leaped through fences like action heroes, maneuvered through hostels like armed robbers, and finally stopped at a lodge. I stopped and placed my hands on my knees, panting hard and feeling my heart beating so fast that I was scared it would cut off. I really needed to join the athletics club and not the student's union. I was out of shape. Then, we were all out of breath and laughing. For the first time, I looked up to see my saviors. "That was fun. I'm Felix Madu, by the way" The young man said, and stretched out his hands "Speak for yourself"–I thought and stretched out my hand to grip his in a firm handshake. " My name is William," I mumbled. "I know," He laughed again and made impressions of me with the megaphone. "Have you boys forgotten about me?", she had said. My gaze automatically shifted to her. My heart stopped. **** "Daydreaming again?" I heard a voice say, and I looked up; it was one of my colleagues, John, or as we liked to call him: the errand boy. "No. I was just–uh–I have a slight headache, so I'm resting my head." He didn't seem to care. "Well, the boss needs you in his office, pronto." Of course, I thought scornfully, who else would they send. And who says pronto? I stood up from my desk and walked slowly towards the boss' office. Most of my colleagues lifted their heads from their huge piles of paper work and watched me as I moved past them. My step was slow, and deliberate. More like automatic; I was like a zombie. I knocked once and then I entered. I looked around the office as if it were my first time in it; it was spacious with a huge brown desk in the middle, which could sit three people comfortably on one side. There were some quality lounge chairs by the side of the office, close to the walls. A flat screen t.v was mounted on the wall, tuned to CNN(typical)–although, I had the feeling it was tuned to that channel for my benefit. He probably watched soap operas. Beside that, a few feet away, was a cupboard on top of which was a coffee maker. The office was a classy affair, compared to the drab cubicles we were made to work in. I closed the door behind me and walked towards the desk. My boss motioned me to a seat as he watched me closely. I sat , very much aware of his gaze. I knew the reason why I was here, my performance lately had been dwindling. I looked at the gold cased name plaque on his desk, 'that must have cost something', I thought. My boss shifted in his seat and cleared his throat. His name was Mr.James O., whatever the 'O' stood for. He was a short man, around 55. He looked shorter than usual today, maybe it was because I sat at the edge of my seat. He was balding, I noticed. He looked well fed and he had a pair of glasses perch on his nose. "I am sure you probably know why I asked for you, you're a clever man." Starting soft, did he want to fire me?. I didn't reply. My face was impassive. He continued, "First of all, I must say, I'm very sorry for your loss, and all you've been through this past week. I understand how you must feel." I gazed at him sharply, he understands?, what did he know, he still had a wife at home, how could he possibly understand. I didn't just lose some stocks or anything. He opened his drawer and brought out a large file and started flipping through it's contents. He was nodding his head and then he frowned a little. "I can't help but notice, Mr.William, that you haven't been performing up to your standards recently. Now, I understand the emotional impact of your loss, but we must not let it affect this company's revenue. I also understand that you didn't want a leave. I will still happily grant you one, recharge yourself and come back. Remember we have a goal to reach by the year's end, and we can't reach that goal when you're sloppy and depressed." He looked up at me. I nodded, still saying nothing. So much for understanding. He looked at me, thought for a while, then he said: "Why not take a few weeks off, It will be paid for don't worry, just go home and relax and recharge yourself. This company needs the full you, you are one of our best players". He closed the file and interlocked his fingers, looking all business like. I shook my head. This was not something I wanted to talk about. I'd already made up my mind. "No sir, I don't really need a leave, I promise I'll pick up. It just takes a little getting used to, but I'll improve." He nodded, "that's what I was told, and I must confess that is also what I would have done, were I in your shoes." I stared at him. He definitely could fit in my shoes, figuratively and literally, and what the hell was he saying, everyone knows that he would never miss the slightest opportunity to leave this office, what a slob. I watched him talk and talk, but I was deep in my own thoughts, I came back when I heard him say: "...which is why I have decided to tag you with someone, she'll be your partner and assistant, that way we'll make up for your lapses." I didn't know what to say. I tried to protest, "but sir...", He cut me short with the wave of his hand, and he place a call to the secretary, "please send in miss Cassidy." Cassidy, what sort of name was that, I bet she'll be totally unattractive just like the last one. This guy certainly had a lousy taste when it comes to women, I thought. Was I wrong. We heard a knock and the door opened gently, then she came in. I followed James' gaze and felt a chill run through my spine when my eyes locked on her. It took me back to that day. The day I met Angela. "Hi, I'm Angela." She said and stretched her hands. I was still breathing hard from our sprint, and I felt hot and cold at the same time. Felix stood there, watching me, an amused glint in his eyes. She was a pretty picture of beauty and innocence. Her hair cut short, and her smile steady, showing a beautiful gap teeth. Her eyes were brown, and alive. It showed spirit, someone who found joy in living. A joy that was contagious. I took her hands in mine. Soft. My mouth was dry, and I stammered, but I couldn't say anything. That day, was the single most important day in my.... "William!" My Boss' voice brought me back. I shook my head and stared at the lady looking at me with a trying-to- place-me look. I felt my mouth go dry.

@ryder help me call the register

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hmm what a world

Nxt

so painful but you will scale through

Maybe your wife come back from the dead lol

CHAPTER FOUR I hadn't expected the person entering to be so stunning. looked at her and took in all her features in one glance; she was tall, probably twenty-five or twenty-seven. She was twenty-six, I'd learn that later. A lightly colored skin with a flawless smoothness, and that face; she had dark, piercing eyes, a small button nose and delicate lips. There was this I-am-the-boss-of-myself- vibe I was getting out of her. She was dressed all business like with a white shirt that most of her neck, a perfectly fitted skirt that was just above the knees. I quickly looked away. I couldn't say that about James; I could see the desire in his eyes as he took in everything. He was practically drooling. He quickly checked himself when he saw me looking at him, I didn't flinch, I wanted him know that I was very much aware what was going on in his head. He cleared his throat and looked away. She walked up to where we were and said: "Good day gentlemen," Her voice was strong, and soft. Femi kept looking at me and smiling like a kid who had just made a major accomplishment, he was obviously feeling smug at the thought of hiring such a 'catch'. I had to admit, she seemed to be the whole package. I mean ,she sounded really brilliant. But that was as far as it went with me, Yes, she is beautiful but so was my wife, she may seem smart but my wife sure was very smart. And... 'William!'- the sharp sound of James' irritated voice shocked me and dragged me back to reality. I have to stop zoning out like this, I told myself. I looked at the faces looking at me; James was obviously pissed off from the expressing on his face, while the lady, well-I wasn't quite sure what it was, or what I saw but she seemed to have this calculative look on her face. Maybe she was trying to figure me out. I tried to say something, but I didn't know what would be appropriate, I really went too deep with my thoughts, it had been happening alot lately. So I just looked back at them, silent, like someone caught in the act. Not a great first impression. Even for me. "Okay, like I was saying, miss.Cassidy will be working with you, it should make up for any lost time, is that alright, mr.William?"-he asked me, but it sounded more like he was compelling me. "Yes Sir." I looked to my right and for a fraction of a second my gaze was locked with Cassidy's, I felt sweat break out in my neck. She looked away, so did I. "You are free to go." He said, turning to me. I rose to my feet and Walked towards the door. I felt hot, and nervous. "Oh, Miss.Cassidy, please hold on a little." James said. How predictable, I thought and closed the door behind me. **** I walked straight to the bathroom. I entered one of the toilets and locked the door behind me. I turned on the tap, and stared at myself in thr mirror. My eyes were red, and I had a week old stubble; I hadn't shaved since the funeral. I scratched my chin and then ran some water over my face. I really needed that. I thought about Cassidy, and then willed myself to forget, and I did. I smiled, it was just a natural reaction of a male to a pretty female. Nothing to it, I was talking out loud now. "No one is going to replace you, " I said and then dried my hands. I went back to my desk and placed my head on it. I needed to go home, I felt overwhelmed. I felt someone's hand tap my shoulders slightly and then I raised up my head. I'd forgotten about the new girl. It was already past midday and all I needed was to go home, but the day just couldn't get any slower. "Is it just me or was that guy weird?", She asked with that sexy smile, jerking a thumb towards James' office. She was starting on friendly grounds. I sincerely didn't want to. I gave out a weak smile, "He's weird. But he's our boss." I added that last part with a stern look. She looked at me, that calculative look in het eyes. "Let's get to work." I said, eager to divert her searching eyes. Thankfully, She agreed. I spent the rest of the day showing Cassidy most of my work. She absorbed them all with an attentive nod and asking questions. I was impressed. And God, I didn't want to be. We worked fast and tirelessly for the next few hours. Occasionally, one of the guys would come around, with no clear idea as to what he wants, just to steal a glance at the new girl. They'd go something like; "Welcome to our world." Or they'd take her hand in theirs, lingering the hold, and blurt out something like : "I didn't know that angels worked in this department." I found this all time wasting and irritating. I think she found it amusing, though, because she kept laughing interestingly. When I walk towards the photocopier to get a stack of papers I would hear whistles and most of them snickering, winking at me and giving me thumbs up. I'd stare at them wondering what that was all about. A guy named Mark walked over to me and tapped my back, "Lucky guy." He said. They sure had the wrong idea. I walked towards Felix's car. It was almost 7pm. I heard a sound and I looked up; It was Cassidy, and She was just getting into her car. I hesitated for a second and then I walked towards her car. Giving the glass a little tap, I watched her wind down the glass. I think I'd startled her. "Hello." I said casually. "Hey," she replied indifferently. I scratched my chin and then said: "Thanks for the assistance today. I didn't know how far behind I was." She stepped out of the car, her smooth long legs coming out first. She was wearing a pink slippers. "Well, I got the impression that you were distracted." She said, not smiling at all. "I-uh, yes, but-" why am I stammering. She was staring at me, her eyes squinted. "See you tomorrow." She said and got into her car. I didn't reply, I just stood there and watched the car drive off. "Some chick, huh?" I turned around to see felix grinning mischievously. I turned away and walked towards the car, "What are you staring at me like that for?" I ask, feeling his gaze on me. He caught up with me and leaned on the car, "Nothing." I looked at him, he still had that look on his face. "I've known you long enough to know that it's not nothing. I also know that its not something I want to hear, so let it be nothing." I got into the passengers seat. "Okay, if you insist. I'll tell you anyways." He got in and shut the door. "The guys are saying you're lucky to land such a fine chick." I leaned back, quiet for a while. "The guys, right?" "Yeah." He smiled. I turned to him, "What of you, what are you saying?" He shrugged, "I don't agree or disagree." "You can't do that." I say, watching the traffic build up outside. Trying hard to keep my cool. "It could be a blessing in disguise." Felix said, starting the car. "Really, how?" He started to speak, then I stopped him, "You know what? Forget I asked. Let's go already." He shrugged, "Okay." **** I thought of the day as we drove towards home. The day had been full of her, so, inadvertently I thought of her. Why did everyone think it's 'lucky' that the new girl gets to work with me? What has luck got to do with anything? I changed my mind and decided to go to Mother's. I turned to Felix, who I knew was watching me occassionally, "Can you drop me off at Mother's place?" "Of course." "Thanks." I leaned towards the window, watching the night market setting up. Hawkers with fruits, and women frying potatoes. We passed Sizzlers, and It made me think of my daughter. We'd always gone there on Sundays. Amy had been staying at my Mother's since the funeral. I think it's better. I mean, I didn't think so, but Mother infused the thought into me. I wanted to ask Felix to stop at Sizzlers so I'd get something for Amy, but I hated to be a bother. The evening traffic was a bit dense, that was normal. I was trying my best to enjoy the drive, but I had alot on my mind. We finally got to mother's home. A place I'd spent the later part of my childhood. "Are you coming in?" I asked Felix. He shook his head, "I'm sorry. I don't want to sleep in traffic. Greet mama for me, and Amara." "I'll do that. Thanks for the ride." I watched the car leave and then turned towards the gate. I think Amy might have heard the sound of the car because she was already waiting at the door. She came out running and jumped unto me,I staggered a bit and then steadied myself. What was mother feeding her?

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NYC story

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Your mama is feeding her food

interesting

NICE STORY I SENSE LOVE IN THE AIR

CHAPTER FIVE Amy wiggled on me as I carried her into the house. "How are you, Sweetie?" I asked, smiling broadly. I was happy. And then looking at her, I frowned. This would have been the time when her mom would yell at her to let me go, she'd always yell: "Why don't you leave Daddy alone, can't you see that he is tired." I really didn't mind. But of course, Amy never thought that I got tired. To her, I was superman to her. I had to be. "Ya, there we go," I said as I dropped her. She giggled and ran inside. I exhaled, I was really tired. My mother walked in, wiping her hands with a hand towel. "Good evening ma," I greeted her, she smiled, walked over and hugged me tight. Then she let go and inspected me. "Look at your face, you are beginning to get dark circles under your eyes. It's been how many days and you already look so much older. do you even sleep at all? and look at how skinny you are." She poked at my ribs, "I'm fine, mother." I said, trying to end the inspection. "You are a man for heaven's sake, you need to start acting like one." I walked over to a couch and sat down, I wish Mother wouldn't yell. I felt like a child all over again. What has being a man got to do with this. Since when did one's anatomy determine how emotional they should get? Sitting down beside me, she softened her tone and said: "I know how you feel, believe me. When I lost your father, I thought my whole world had ended. I even wanted to take my own life." She paused and sighed. I looked at her, suicide? That was news to me. She looked up at me, "but you were here, my only consolation. I had you and so I had a reason to live." She rubbed my arm and then stood up. She looked at my daughter who was planted in front of the t.v, "You have her. That's your reason to live." She went into the kitchen. I looked at Amy who was watching Spongebob squarepants. I felt peaceful at that moment. I sighed, maybe mother was right. I needed to stop the grieving, it really was affecting me. I stood up at sat beside Amy in front of the TV. "Hey princess, wat'ya doing?"–I said playfully. My eyes strained a bit, maybe we were too close to the TV. Amy smiled, without looking away, "I'm watching cartoons, it's really good. That yellow one is Spongebob and the pink one is Patrick . "Oh, they seem nice," replied sincerely. She nodded, "uh-huh, and they are my friends, too". "William, what will you eat?"–Mom called from the kitchen. "Don't worry, Mother. I have to go anyways, some other time." She came out of the steaming kitchen, "Nonsense. Here take this," she handed me a bag packed full with plastic plates of food. "Thank you, ma." I said, taking the bag. I got on my feet and picked up my jacket. Mother quickly looked at me, "What are you doing?" I was confused. She shook her head, waving the spoon in her hand, "That food is for you when you go home. You will eat dinner with us." It was not a suggestion, "Yes mother."

@ryder @freshgirl help me the register

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YEA U HAVE A REASON TO LIVE

waiting for next epi

You have a great mother

Conti...

episode 6 The day was Saturday and I'd planned to sleep till the next morning. Amy was still at Mother's and the house still felt desolate and empty. Over the week, I'd developed a new habit: sleeping in the guest bedroom. For some reason, I didn't feel too comfortable sleeping in the main bedroom. Maybe it was because I constantly saw her in my dreams. Dreams that always left me in a dampened mood; something I'd been trying to avoid. I also didn't venture anywhere else except the kitchen. Not even the living room. If not for the fact that I had to pass through the living room to get to the main door, nothing would have taken me there. Also, if not for the fact that the restroom was more of a necessity(since I visited the kitchen a lot), I wouldn't have gone there either. On this Saturday, however, my plan to sleep all day was interrupted by Felix. It was 8a.m and I was still stuck on bed. This, to me, was good because it meant that I still had many hours to sleep. At least that was until I heard my phone ring. It took two rings for me to wake up. I opened my eyes slowly and reached for my phone. I squinted at the display as I saw the caller ID: Felix. I hit silent and flip the phone over. Snuggling my pillow, I went back to sleep. I was still in that mode when the first try is not enough to spoil the sleep flow. The second try came soon enough. I heard the phone ring again. I reached for it, this time not bothering to check the ID, and activate the 'do not disturb' button. Smiling to myself, I tried to go back to sleep. A task now. By the third try, there was no need trying to sleep again. I heard the beeping noise; I groan and check for the source: it's coming from my small Nokia phone. Christ! I'd forgotten about that. "Hello," I say into the phone, the sleep all gone by now. "I knew you would ignore my calls on purpose. Good morning, by the way." I push myself off the bed and stretch my arms. "If you knew I'd ignore your calls, why bother calling?" "I'll take that as a rhetorical question," Felix said. "Why are you calling?" I ask, seriously wondering why he was calling. "It's Saturday, brother." He says, "And?" I heard him hiss, "And it's Saturday. I don't need to add anything else to that." I can make out some noises over the phone like he was walking. "Where are you?" I ask, wondering what he was up to. At that moment, I hear the door bell. "At your front door; open up." Unbelievable, I mutter as I got up to my feet and walked towards the living room. The call is still connected but I'm not listening. I made sure the phone was sitting in my pocket by the time I reach the front door. I took my time unlocking the door. It hadn't been my intention to be by this door at a few minutes past 8 in the morning. I opened the door, blinking rapidly as a result of the morning sunlight. Too bright. "You know, you could have ended the call." He says, taking the phone off his ears and staring at me. I step aside, "And so could you." He shrugged and walked into the house. I noticed that he is dressed in running clothes. "Were you jogging?" I asked, a bit surprised. "Jesus, No." I raise an eyebrow. "It's Gloria. Apparently, she is one of those Chicks who's obsessed with health and staying in shape or whatever." "That's really serious." I say with a teasing smile. "What are you smiling about?" I shrug, "Nothing. It just seems like you're really serious with this one." Felix frowned a little, "Maybe, and sincerely it frightens me." "Why?" I ask as I go in to get my toothbrush. I hear his voice behind me. "I think– and I'm just saying –but I think that the thought of settling down with one woman makes me scared because I'm–uhm what's the word– a free bird, you know." I nod and smile, "Promiscuous." "What?" I hear him say, "Promiscuous, that's the word you're looking for; by free bird you mean promiscuous." He laughed, "Shut up, you." I'm in the bathroom, brushing my teeth and I don't hear a word. I know he's there and I know he's probably thinking about something. "What are you thinking about?" I gurgled and spat. "It's Saturday, you know." I poke my head out and frown, "And?" He looks away, "I'm just saying, let's go out and you know, mix." "Mix? I don't understand." "Come on, man. You know, have some fun and meet some people." I step out of the bathroom, wiping my hands. "And is it safe to assume that by 'people' you mean ladies?" He starts walking back to the living room, "That's not a bad idea, is it?" "Let me get this straight," I say, "It's been a couple of months since your best friend lost his wife and you advice him to go out and mix?" Felix scratched his chin, "Yes?" I nod and walk into the kitchen. I spent the next ten minutes reheating the food Mother dropped by the previous day(It had become a new habit; I don't cook anymore). I returned to the living room to find Felix flipping through channels on the TV. "Jesus, there's nothing good on TV this morning." I place a warm plate on his lap and carry mine to the couch. "What do you expect? It's Saturday morning. Its either the news or cartoons." "Yuck!" Felix grimaced. I look at him, "The news or cartoons?" "Both." I nod and start eating. Breakfast today was rice and vegetable stew. Felix also began to work on his food. "This is good. Did you cook it?" "I wish. No, it was Mother." We ate in silence most of the meal with the TV volume set low. I liked it this way. I wasn't planning to talk about anything. Felix had other ideas. "So..." He started. I turned to him, "So?" "What about Cassidy?" "Who?" "Oh, come on. You know who I'm talking about." "What about her?" He dropped his plate on the floor beside his chair. "You know," he said, raising his shoulders. I looked at him straight, "Two things: one, the kitchen is that way, you can take your plate there. And two, I don't know." I watched him as he picked his plate and walked towards the kitchen. "You are a bad host, you know?" He called out from the kitchen. "And how is that?" I ask him. He came out with a bottle of water and pointed at it; "You gave me food without any water. What if I'd choked?" "Then you'd die." I say, stretching my plate to him. He reluctantly took it and shook his head, "I can't die; I'm indestructible." "Of course you are, buddy." "On a serious note, tell me about Cassidy." "She's my colleague and a woman." "Very funny,Will, very funny." I smile at him, "I try." He starts heading for the door. "Where are you going?" "My house" "Why?" "Because my house is where Gloria is and Gloria is a woman, a deliciously hot woman. I'd rather spend my Saturday morning with her than a whiny best friend who is trying to play mystery but sucks at it." I stand up from the couch. "Okay, okay. What do you want from me?" He smiled, his hand on the door handle. "Tonight, we loosen up." I sighed. He lets go of the handle and walks closer to me, "Look, Buddy, I'm not trying to get you out there simply because it would be fun. No, look at you–I mean, you haven't shaved in a week– and you're slowly letting yourself go. And its been only two months!" He placed his hand on his waist, "I'm scared to think of how the next month would be, or the months following that. Dare I say it, you'd be overweight, and probably spotting a 'Jesus beard'." I laugh at this and he laughs, too. "Okay. Fine." I say. "Fantastic! I'll be back here tonight. It will be fun, I promise." "Yeah. Fun." I closed the door after He'd gone and just stood there staring at the empty house

@ryder @freshgirl @jummbabe @vitoriouschild @ladyg @itzprince one of u should help with d register

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You should have a little fun but not the type Felix wishes

RIDE ON

MOVE ON..!

You have to go out stop hiding.

CHAPTER SIX The day was Saturday and I'd planned to sleep till the next morning. Amy was still at Mother's and the house still felt desolate and empty. Over the week, I'd developed a new habit: sleeping in the guest bedroom. For some reason, I didn't feel too comfortable sleeping in the main bedroom. Maybe it was because I constantly saw her in my dreams. Dreams that always left me in a dampened mood; something I'd been trying to avoid. I also didn't venture anywhere else except the kitchen. Not even the living room. If not for the fact that I had to pass through the living room to get to the main door, nothing would have taken me there. Also, if not for the fact that the restroom was more of a necessity(since I visited the kitchen a lot), I wouldn't have gone there either. On this Saturday, however, my plan to sleep all day was interrupted by Felix. It was 8a.m and I was still stuck on bed. This, to me, was good because it meant that I still had many hours to sleep. At least that was until I heard my phone ring. It took two rings for me to wake up. I opened my eyes slowly and reached for my phone. I squinted at the display as I saw the caller ID: Felix. I hit silent and flip the phone over. Snuggling my pillow, I went back to sleep. I was still in that mode when the first try is not enough to spoil the sleep flow. The second try came soon enough. I heard the phone ring again. I reached for it, this time not bothering to check the ID, and activate the 'do not disturb' button. Smiling to myself, I tried to go back to sleep. A task now. By the third try, there was no need trying to sleep again. I heard the beeping noise; I groan and check for the source: it's coming from my small Nokia phone. Christ! I'd forgotten about that. "Hello," I say into the phone, the sleep all gone by now. "I knew you would ignore my calls on purpose. Good morning, by the way." I push myself off the bed and stretch my arms. "If you knew I'd ignore your calls, why bother calling?" "I'll take that as a rhetorical question," Felix said. "Why are you calling?" I ask, seriously wondering why he was calling. "It's Saturday, brother." He says, "And?" I heard him hiss, "And it's Saturday. I don't need to add anything else to that." I can make out some noises over the phone like he was walking. "Where are you?" I ask, wondering what he was up to. At that moment, I hear the door bell. "At your front door; open up." Unbelievable, I mutter as I got up to my feet and walked towards the living room. The call is still connected but I'm not listening. I made sure the phone was sitting in my pocket by the time I reach the front door. I took my time unlocking the door. It hadn't been my intention to be by this door at a few minutes past 8 in the morning. I opened the door, blinking rapidly as a result of the morning sunlight. Too bright. "You know, you could have ended the call." He says, taking the phone off his ears and staring at me. I step aside, "And so could you." He shrugged and walked into the house. I noticed that he is dressed in running clothes. "Were you jogging?" I asked, a bit surprised. "Jesus, No." I raise an eyebrow. "It's Gloria. Apparently, she is one of those Chicks who's obsessed with health and staying in shape or whatever." "That's really serious." I say with a teasing smile. "What are you smiling about?" I shrug, "Nothing. It just seems like you're really serious with this one." Felix frowned a little, "Maybe, and sincerely it frightens me." "Why?" I ask as I go in to get my toothbrush. I hear his voice behind me. "I think– and I'm just saying –but I think that the thought of settling down with one woman makes me scared because I'm–uhm what's the word– a free bird, you know." I nod and smile, "Promiscuous." "What?" I hear him say, "Promiscuous, that's the word you're looking for; by free bird you mean promiscuous." He laughed, "Shut up, you." I'm in the bathroom, brushing my teeth and I don't hear a word. I know he's there and I know he's probably thinking about something. "What are you thinking about?" I gurgled and spat. "It's Saturday, you know." I poke my head out and frown, "And?" He looks away, "I'm just saying, let's go out and you know, mix." "Mix? I don't understand." "Come on, man. You know, have some fun and meet some people." I step out of the bathroom, wiping my hands. "And is it safe to assume that by 'people' you mean ladies?" He starts walking back to the living room, "That's not a bad idea, is it?" "Let me get this straight," I say, "It's been a couple of months since your best friend lost his wife and you advice him to go out and mix?" Felix scratched his chin, "Yes?" I nod and walk into the kitchen. I spent the next ten minutes reheating the food Mother dropped by the previous day(It had become a new habit; I don't cook anymore). I returned to the living room to find Felix flipping through channels on the TV. "Jesus, there's nothing good on TV this morning." I place a warm plate on his lap and carry mine to the couch. "What do you expect? It's Saturday morning. Its either the news or cartoons." "Yuck!" Felix grimaced. I look at him, "The news or cartoons?" "Both." I nod and start eating. Breakfast today was rice and vegetable stew. Felix also began to work on his food. "This is good. Did you cook it?" "I wish. No, it was Mother." We ate in silence most of the meal with the TV volume set low. I liked it this way. I wasn't planning to talk about anything. Felix had other ideas. "So..." He started. I turned to him, "So?" "What about Cassidy?" "Who?" "Oh, come on. You know who I'm talking about." "What about her?" He dropped his plate on the floor beside his chair. "You know," he said, raising his shoulders. I looked at him straight, "Two things: one, the kitchen is that way, you can take your plate there. And two, I don't know." I watched him as he picked his plate and walked towards the kitchen. "You are a bad host, you know?" He called out from the kitchen. "And how is that?" I ask him. He came out with a bottle of water and pointed at it; "You gave me food without any water. What if I'd choked?" "Then you'd die." I say, stretching my plate to him. He reluctantly took it and shook his head, "I can't die; I'm indestructible." "Of course you are, buddy." "On a serious note, tell me about Cassidy." "She's my colleague and a woman." "Very funny,Will, very funny." I smile at him, "I try." He starts heading for the door. "Where are you going?" "My house" "Why?" "Because my house is where Gloria is and Gloria is a woman, a deliciously hot woman. I'd rather spend my Saturday morning with her than a whiny best friend who is trying to play mystery but sucks at it." I stand up from the couch. "Okay, okay. What do you want from me?" He smiled, his hand on the door handle. "Tonight, we loosen up." I sighed. He lets go of the handle and walks closer to me, "Look, Buddy, I'm not trying to get you out there simply because it would be fun. No, look at you–I mean, you haven't shaved in a week– and you're slowly letting yourself go. And its been only two months!" He placed his hand on his waist, "I'm scared to think of how the next month would be, or the months following that. Dare I say it, you'd be overweight, and probably spotting a 'Jesus beard'." I laugh at this and he laughs, too. "Okay. Fine." I say. "Fantastic! I'll be back here tonight. It will be fun, I promise." "Yeah. Fun." I closed the door after He'd gone and just stood there staring at the empty house

CHAPTER SEVEN I found my way back into the guest bedroom. Walking towards the bed, I let myself fall on it and, surprisingly, I drift off to sleep. Waking up on my own accord this time, I scanned the room for the wall clock; it was 5:36p.m Had I really slept that long? Reaching for my phone, I went through my emails. Seeing nothing of interest, I dropped the phone. I was really feeling the need to have a long, long shower. That was what I intended to do. I stood up from the bed, trying to ignore the pain in my head. Taking my time(as usual), I walked up to the bathroom and pushed open the door. I stood in the middle of the bathroom, staring at my tired face from the small mirrors surrounding me. Felix had been right; my chin was covered with stubble. Small patches of uneven hairs which, on a normal day, wouldn't have survived a few minutes of my sighting them. Now they thrived happily; sprouting here and there, paving the way for a 'Jesus beard'. I took a deep breath. Loosen up. Sure, I could do that. I opened the cupboard and brought out my shaving kit. After about five minutes, I was staring at my clean shaven face. I couldn't help but smile a little. I'd forgotten to turn on the water heater. This meant that I'd have to shower with cold water; that was okay by me. The cold water will be refreshing and soothing. I was wrong. The water was too cold that I immediately ducked aside and turned off the shower. A few minutes later saw me sitting on my bed, Unclad except for a towel around my waist and dripping wet. I was waiting for the heater to work its magic. Around 6:30, I heard the door bell ring. I was still in a steam covered bathroom, I grudgingly turn off the shower and wrapped a towel around my waist. I opened the door to a smiling Felix; he wasn't alone. "Good evening, brother!" He beamed and pushed his way in, as always. I looked at the girl, Gloria I presumed. "Come in," I said, not in the least bit worried that I was clad only in a bath towel. "You're here early." I said, seriously weighing the possibilities of resuming that shower. "What do you mean?" Felix asked, dropping himself on the Sofa. " I mean, I didn't think you'd be here by Six-thirty. I thought maybe eight or nine." Felix shook his head slightly, "And when would the party start if we leave here by that ridiculous time." I just shrugged and started walking towards the hallway. "Speaking of leaving," he called out, "be fast and get ready. I need us to leave soon." I muttered an inaudible 'Whatever you say' and walked into the bedroom. I could hear Felix talking loudly in the living. I walked up to my wardrobe and opened it; I absentmindedly picked out a baggy Hockey shirt and a brown trouser. I stood in front of the mirror and thought of Angela. She'd been the one who always picked my clothes. According to her, I had a disgustingly thin taste in clothing. She was always right, though. I smiled at thought. I put on the clothes I'd picked out and watched myself in the mirror. I nodded satisfactory; I looked just okay. I wasn't going to impress anyone afterall. I walked into the living room moments later and was about to say 'Lets go' but the look on Felix's face told me that something was horribly wrong. "What is it?" Felix got up from the couch arm, where he had been practically crowding Gloria and, with a weird smile on his face, grabbed me by my arm and pulled me back into the hallway, towards the room. "What?" I asked again, my arm almost hurting. "What do you think you're doing?" He asked, almost whispering. "Were you not the one who..." He waved his hand, "Just stop there." He looked around the room as if he would find someone eavesdropping. Then he turned to me. "You're like what a brick layer would look like if he suddenly dropped the blocks, puts on a shirt and headed for the club." He said this with a look of dismay. Was there a reply to that, I thought. "I don't understand, is something wrong with what I'm wearing." I asked. I watched him put his hand on his forehead as if he was suddenly faced with the burden of a national crisis. "William, when I look at you right now, I'm not attracted. And I'm a guy!" "So?" I smiled, "We are going for a night out. There would be lots of people there." I sat on the bed, "And by lots of people, you mean women?" "Not specifically, but yes. Now, where do you keep your clothes?" "Why do you want to know?" He opened the wardrobe, "Because, who wears a Hockey shirt. I didn't even know you had one." "I bought it 2 years ago. Angela never let me wear it." Felix paused, and turned to me, "The shirt is horrible and those trousers are hideous; did you do this on purpose?" "Do what?" I feign ignorance. "Did you put on that hideous outfit on purpose?" I looked at my watch, "Of course. Its only babies that don't get to wear clothes on purpose. How can you even ask me that?" Felix gave out a frustrated gasp, "Jesus, William! I mean, did you you..you know what? Forget it, lets just go." I got up, "Finally." **** I sat in the backseat of Felix's car, He was behind the wheels with Gloria beside him. I sat quietly, praying for us to arrive already, so this can end. The car was quiet most of the way until Gloria spoke. "Am sorry about your wife, Mr.William." "Gloria!" Felix almost shouted, "You really had to bring that up now?" I looked at her and smiled, "Thank you. And just William is okay." The car was silent again. I felt obliged, as a courtesy, to say something. "So, Gloria, where do you work?" "Oh, and still in school. I'm a final year Law student." I nodded and looked at Felix who seemed to know I was staring at him. "Oh really, that's impressive. Finally, someone to get that guy out of trouble." It wasn't that funny, but She laughed and Felix chuckled. I was almost tempted to ask Felix how they met, but no, I was through with talking. "Is it this street?" Felix asked. "What?" I said, leaning forward. "Not you, brother. I was asking Gloria." "Okay." "No, its the next one," Gloria said, looking around, "I'm Chatting her up. She says she's outside waiting." Curious. Who's waiting? "Uhm, are we picking up someone?" I asked, now suspicious. Felix looked into the rear mirror and then gripped the wheel tightly; he was definitely up to something. "Uh, yeah. Gloria's friend. She's going out with us." I nodded my head. How naive did this guy think I was? I did the math: We were three in the car; two guys and a girl. One guy is with the girl while the other guy is sitting alone in the back seat. Now they were picking up a new girl, a friend to the first girl. That son of a bitch, he's trying to pair me with a girl. The car stopped and Felix tapped the horn, he didn't bother to look at me. He probably know's I want to kill him now. Gloria got out of the car and walked into a thin street. Finally, my chance. "Felix, what are you doing?!" He hesitated and then turned back to me, serious faced, "What does it look like I'm doing?" "It looks like you are trying to hook me up." "Since you already know, why ask?" I opened the car door and stepped out. I looked around me and beginning walking towards the road. The shirt was really baggy; flaying in the evening breeze like a flag. "Where do you think you're going?" Felix asked, running up to me. I didn't answer. "William!" He shouted. "What?! I shouted back and faced him. "What are you doing?" Felix asked. "I don't know, what are you doing?" "I asked you first." "And then I asked you again." Felix turned around and faced the direction of the car. The girls were already standing by the car, waiting. Felix waved at them and then turned to me. "Come on, Will." "I thought you understood that I'm still trying to live with the fact that I lost my wife." "I know, but.." "I can't start having dates already. Its unfair to her." Felix sighed, "Its just a little company, you don't have to do anything. And yes, I understand. Why do you think I'm going through this stress?" I didn't answer. He sighed, "Look, sooner or later, hopefully sooner, you'll have to move on. Okay, lets just say this is a practice run, yeah, a practice run. You don't have to do anything, just talk." "Okay." Felix smiled and tapped my shoulders, "If it makes you feel any better, you look like a hideous manikin in that outfit, She'll probably not even like you." I smiled, "Shut up, you." We walked back to the car, "Sorry ladies," Felix started, "we were having a little 'manly' discussion." He made an air quote with his fingers. I looked at Gloria's friend. She was very beautiful, I had to admit and very young. Must have been 21. She also looked shy; not a good thing, I concluded. That would make all the social responsibilities fall on me. I would have preferred one of those chatty ones. "Hello, Rose," Felix said to Gloria's friend, "This is My buddy, William. William, this is Rose, Gloria's friend." "Hi," I said, taking her hands in mine. Soft and trembling? Shy alright. She raised her small eyes to mine and smiled, "Hi," she replied. I shook her hand and quickly left it. Looking at Felix, I said: "Let's go then." I could see that he was watching the expression on my face. I gave him nothing. * Felix pulled into the parking lot of SHAX, a discrete Club that didn't open past midnight. It was dark already, although with a little light. I stepped out of the car, totally forgetting about Rose. I was the displeased friend who was dragged to go out clubbing on a Saturday night, and I was ready to play the part. Felix locked the Car doors and grabbed Gloria's waist. "Let's go, baby." He said, walking towards the entrance with her. I stared at him; I might as well not have been there. I sighed and looked at the Shy Rose. I smiled a little and started towards the entrance. She followed suit. The club felt crowded and the music loud. But as usual, Felix didn't feel the same way. He picked a table with four chairs; a pair on each opposite end. "SHAX is dull today." He said, taking a seat and offering me the one beside him. He leaned towards me, "The ladies sit opposite us. What do you think of Rose?" "I just met her, Felix. What should I think?" He shrugged and, thankfully, let the matter drop. I brought out my phone and began scrolling for something to read. "You'll drink beer." I heard Felix say. I turned to him, "uhm, okay." "It was not a question, buddy. Remember, loosen up." And with that he grabbed my phone and placed it on the table. "And that includes you, too." He said loudly, collecting Gloria's phone. The drinks arrived. Thank God. For some reason, Felix felt inclined to make everyone talk. I poured a little of the beer into a glass cup and watched the million bubbles sizzle. Felix was blabbing something about work and somehow everyone laughed. I couldn't get myself to care but I chuckled anyways. The one thing I was grateful to Felix for was his ability to 'engage' the ladies. I sipped my beer slowly and watched Felix recount some supposedly hilarious experience; apparently, it was 'so' funny. I didn't get it, though. My 'date' had obviously lost interest in me by now. I was grateful for that. Although, I was beginning to feel self conscious about my oversized Hockey shirt. I looked around the bar, it was beginning to get a little too stuffy for me. I shifted my chair backward and got up to my feet. "Please excuse me." I said and began to squeeze my way towards the exit. The cool night air hit my face as I pushed the door open. I walked through the parking lot and stopped by a mini- mart. I bought a chocolate wafer(it used to be her favorite). I opened the wafer and began picking it. I roamed round the parking lot and then began to walk back towards the entrance. Before Felix gets any more excited. "William." Someone said my name. I turned around to see who called; it was Cassidy. The new girl from work. I smiled faintly and walked up towards her. "Hi." I said, not knowing if to stretch out my hand for a hand shake. Luckily, She didn't seem to bother. She was wearing a black gown that fell just above her knees and her hair was free. "Hey, what are you doing here?" She asked me. I pointed towards the building. "I accompanied a friend." She nodded. "You...er..are you with someone?" "Oh, yes." She muttered as if she'd just remembered, "I came with a couple of my girlfriends. They literally dragged me here." She chuckled and I followed suit. "That's the same story over here. I prefer staying at home on Saturdays." She smiled, "Me, too." She then narrowed her eyes at me, "You have a funny shirt." I immediately felt uncomfortable the moment she said that. What was I supposed to say, thanks? I stammered, "I..uhm." She laughed. A rich, sincere laughter. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that. I really don't care about your shirt." I laughed, relieved. I shuffled my feet and thought of what next to say. Here I was, standing with a pretty girl who, by the way, was watching me and I literally had no idea what to say next. "Have you been to the Arcade before?" "What?" I asked, looking at her. "The Arcade. You know–where you play games." I nodded, "Oh, yes. I–uh–I've taken my daughter there a few times." She smiled, "Awesome. I love the Arcade. There's a new one open in the Mall," She checked her watch, "Its still early, we can still get in." I was about to say 'okay' but I remembered Felix. "What of uh–your friends?" I pointed towards SHAX. Also asking myself about Felix. She shrugged, "They'll be fine. I'd rather visit that new arcade than sit around a table gisting aimlessly. Lets go!" She walked off. I followed her. Felix can cover for me. "Did you drive here?" My voice is hoarse. She turned to me, "No. Did you?" I stopped, almost colliding with her. I shook my head. "The Arcade is not that far. We can walk the distance." I cringed at the talk of walking any sort of distance with her, saying nothing and just bteathing. "Okay." I said, and we began our walk.

CHAPTER EIGHT It was Sunday morning and I was still asleep. I woke up with a strange feeling. A strange elation, one I hadn't felt for months now. I stretched my legs and sat upright. What was that feeling? And then I remembered last night. I found myself smiling; the night at the arcade. Hold on, why was I smiling? I quickly got off the bed and dashed into the bathroom. I switch on the tap and began washing my face. I was scared. I had enjoyed my time last night, and that was bad. I was scared that it might prove easy to forget Angela after all. Curse you Felix. I took deep breaths. "Relax, Its not a bad thing if you had fun last night, with a pretty woman," I kept reassuring myself. "A pretty woman who was your coworker." I reminded myself. Calm down, it was easy. All I had to do was avoid any contact with Cassidy or any other woman. How hard could that possibly be? I shouldn't have listened to Felix. Speaking of Felix, I walked out of the bathroom and picked my phone. I rang him twice but he didn't pick. He was probably in Church. I sat on the bed and placed my face on my palm. I couldn't help but remember last night. **** "I didn't see you as someone I'd spot at SHAX." She said to me as we walked. I dipped my hands into my pockets, "That's because I'm not. Felix literally dragged me there. He wants to get me 'out there'." She laughed and then became silent. "I'm sorry about your wife. I heard about that, it must have been hard." Hard? I thought about the days I went without food. The day dreams and nightmares. The zoning out at work and more day dreaming. "Yes. Hard." I just said. "You don't have to get out there just yet. You still need time to, you know, get over the hurt." I stopped and looked at her. She understood. "Yes. Thank you. That's what I've been saying." I started walking, "Although, I don't think I want to get over anything." "Really?" She asked. "Yes. I mean, I think its the hurt that keeps her to me. I fear I may forget her." She remained silent till we got to the Mall. Then she turned to me. "No matter how hard you hold on, sooner or later you tend to forget. That's why we have our memories and also, they are in our hearts. The hurt only kills you." She said this and walked into the Mall. I paused and thought of what she said, and then I shook my head. I didn't agree. I'd rather hang on to the hurt. Let it kill me. The Arcade was located inside the City Mall on the second floor. At this time, there were not a lot of people at the arcade. Mostly young adults, and a few kids who'd probably 'blackmailed' their parents into a night at the arcades. I stepped into the large room, taking in the sounds and trying hard not to recall any family time I'd spent in settings like this. I watched Cassidy skip from one station to another. What was with her? She finally settled for a colorful space shooter. It was a two player game. "How's your shooting skills?" She asked. "Huh?" I moped. "Can you play this?" She turned to me excitedly. I wanted to ask her if something was wrong. I mean, we barely knew each other except for work and here She was, giddy and so relaxed, like we've known each other forever. I concluded that She must have gone through some emotional trauma recently. Maybe a breakup. Yeah, that makes sense. Instead, I picked up the orange laser gun and nodded. The game was pretty simple to me; mostly because I focused all my attention on it. All you had to do was shoot at waves after waves of Zombie aliens. We played that game for about ten minutes then it became boring. I wondered how kids spent hours on stuff like this. I saw a more 'sensible' station that looked like a tiny basketball court. That looked simple enough. I dropped the laser gun and turned to her, "How's your shooting skills?" I asked, thinking myself clever. She giggled when She saw me pointing towards the basketball station. "Nice one." The game was made up of a small basketball hoop merged into a pinball arcade-like box. All you had to do was throw the red ball through the hoop. Simple. I was getting bold. I went first, picking the ball and tossing it through the hoop. Two points. "Not bad." She muttered and picked up a second ball. She steadied herself and tossed the ball lightly, it circled and went in. "Yes!" She jumped excitedly. What the hell. I consciously looked around us just to be sure that people weren't staring. I couldn't help but smile. Loosen up, I heard Felix voice say in my head. We finished that round without missing a shot. Then the attendant walked up to us and asked if we wanted a better challenge. Sure, why not. He set the machine to intermediate and the hoop started sliding through a space. I didn't think it could do that. Cassidy shoved me aside and picked up the ball. She hunched her back and leaped slightly, tossing the ball into the air. She missed. I let out a snigger. "I'll like to see you do better." She said, feigning annoyance. Or was it real? I cleared my throat and picked up the ball. As I steadied myself for a shot, I understood how She could have missed; the damn hoop was tricky. I gave it a shot and also missed. I was relieved. I had no idea if She was a good sport. She patted my shoulder(soft hands) and picked another ball. We kept at it for a much longer time: half an hour, and it was surprisingly fun. All the while we were together, the thought of Felix never once crossed my mind. Well, except when we got to the food court and I saw a Chicken Republic poster that featured a guy grinning widely with two girls by his side. I could see Felix doing that. After what I thought was an hour, which by the way was two hours, I decided it was time to head back. "It's getting late." I said. She smiled at me, "Of course," and then She kept quiet. Please, keep talking. I wanted to say. Instead we walked towards the exit in an increasingly awkward silence. For me, I think. Because She kept looking around with an almost Child-like fascination. "I hope you had fun?" She asked as we stepped into the fresh air. It was marvelous, I wanted to say. Instead; "Yes." "I'm sorry if I dragged you away from yiur friend." I turned to her, "What, no. I actually wanted to leave anyways." "Oh, good." She nodded. We walked up to the parking lot at SHAX. Felix's car wasn't there, I noticed. She walked up to her car. "Aren't you going to check if.." She shook her head, "They've been gone for half an hour now. I got a text." A text, of course. I was pretty sure I didn't get any from Felix and curse me, I should have texted him. She got into her car, "Are you sure you don't need a ride?" Hell no, I wanted to say. But I think we all know by now that I don't usually say what's on my mind. "No, thanks. Felix will pick me up." Fat chance. He was probably sandwiched between Gloria and a couch by now. Thankfully, not mine. I tried to get my thoughts off that picture. "Okay. See you at work." She slammed the door shut. I stepped back when the engine started. I saw the window roll down, "Hey." She called. I moved forward, "I think you're a nice guy. But, you're so–distracted." She engaged the gear and the car edged away. Distracted? I kicked a pebble and began walking towards the entrance of SHAX. Maybe I was distracted. A good thing, right? Felix wasn't inside, as I'd thought. I went outside and got a Taxi. The first thing I'd do when I get home would be to burn this hockey shirt.

help me call the register @ryder and @ladyg

guy loosen up

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Lol u need to burn that thing

U need to loosen up oo and try moving on

Now you want to burn the hockey t-shirt Poor thing ??????????

dem b tell u naw

Following

On top wetin

Guy wake up naw