1) Some African girls love food so much, you will take her to the
Zoo and ask what's her favourite Animal and she will answer you
"Roasted Chicken"
2) *Can i ask a question to you my female friends in this group.*
*That 30 second you wait while your boyfriend is putting on a
condom, what goes through your mind?*
3) Finally i have made it, I can now speak French... Born June
mama, come on serve her, serve her beer mercy.
4) The Way I feel cold these days eh, it's like God is preparing me
for overseas weather. Speak Lord, your son is listening.
5) If you see my bae cheating, please tell me in October, this time
it's way too cold to be single.
6) Some ladies go post and you will be encouraged to encourage
them to get 2D book just because their handwriting is too poor for
even 4G service, bois are you with me?
7) Is it a crime to correct Nigerian when they want to call head of
state? Them go call treshident instead of freshident.
8) When you dey ask me why zoo no dey Warri? You wan make
Warri boys steal the lion...
9) If you are on my list and you are broke, raise your hand , don't
be shy... Let us block you. Two captains can't be in the same ship
.
10) Dating someone for four years without any sign of marriage is
not a relationship ,,it's now a course ,,you are now studying a
degree in Relationship management and analysis
11) Caling a fat girl "my angel" is pure wickedness,
hw do u expect her to fly?
"MY ROCK OF AGES" is better.. Yee who slap me
12) Please don't say your girlfriend is beautiful if you have never
seen her without
makeup
13) The only time a man can remember all the ladies he has slept
with is.....
When his HIV-RESULT is delayed.
14) if Ur woman catches u looking another woman turn 2 her and
say sweetheart m glad you dont dress like that.
15) Girls with small breasts are always scared to hang their bra's
outside because it looks like eyeglasses
16) You Are Dating A Yahoo Boy And You Expect Him To Be
Faithful And Truthful To You. Don’t You Know He Lies For A
Living ?
17) Stop blaming alcohol influence when you hit your wife.My
brother why didn't the alcohol lead you to Army barracks to go
slap a soldier
18) Behind every successful man, there is a WOMAN. If you want
to be more successful, Increase the Number.
I just discovered this concept recently.
19) *Please the fact that I'm free with everyone in this group
doesn't guarantee you to be doing things without my notice, I
repeat who sent 100,000 into my mobile money account???*
20) Bae: would you take a bullet for. Me.......
Boo: taking things that are not yours is theft......
21) Even if God decides to call us to heaven by phone...........
Some Nigeria
girls will still be like...... "how did you get my number "
22) That guy who discovered milk
What was he doing with the cow's breast in the first place???
23) That moment when you are trying to impress your crush and
you now tell the taxi driver "You can keep the change", then he
yells "Oga, your money never complete".
24) Every time I kill a mosquito,I put it in a chair next to ma bed so
that other mosquitoes can see how dangerous I am!!!!
25) You wouldn't know how difficult life is until a bus conductor
puts his armpit over your face while collecting his money. Lord
have mercy
26) Only a Nigerian girl can allow you to kiss
her, take off her top, remove her jeans, take
off her bra and panty, see you wear a condom
then suddenly asks "what do you want to
do ?"
Me : I want to join MMM.
27..i want 2 b rich to d extent dat if I shuld see a single rat in my house.id rada abandon it nd go for a new one...
28...watching horror movie at nite its fun nd interestin..bt until u hear knock on ur door..yes who is that..??bt no ansa..suddenly ur door opens wide on its own..jesus christ wer is my bible..
29..i was dreaming I am eatin bread.after eatin d bread finish.i walk a litle nd saw a big coconut.as I carried it to eat..slap mix wit fire..toches me dat I woke up nd saw my brother tellin me idiot u don eat pillow finish naw its my head u want 2 chop abi..chineke.
30..merlin will say few words somtin will happen..bt amadioha.wil tell u to bring d following items..just to av a soap...bring a laboured mosquitoe..a pregnant ant..a lame lizard..a virgin rat..nd a womanizing fly....lolz gud day
