LOST

It had been raining for more than a week,
so much rain it made everyday seemed
so restless and gloomy. She called and
said she was coming up. It was the third
time she came up to see me that week. I
carried her excuse of why she came all
the way here and went to meet her at
the nearby seven-eleven. She was
standing there alone, carrying her red
umbrella. Her friend had dropped her off.
It was raining and she was shivering. She
looked weak and fragile in the harsh rain,
wearing not enough to keep her warm.
She said, "I miss you."
I told her coldly, "Lets go, I'll take you
home." She did not open up her
umbrella, I knew she wanted to share
mine. I said, "Open up your umbrella,
let's go." Unwillingly, She opened up her
umbrella and walked with me to the car.
She said she hadn't eat lunch or dinner
and asked if we could stop at some place
to eat. Right away I answered with a
stoned heart, "No!" Disappointed, she
asked me to take her to the train station,
she said she would take the train back
home. Maybe it was the rain, all the
trains were full of people with umbrellas
and suit cases who were eager to get
home, not caring about who just passed
by.
We waited and waited, she looked at me
innocently. Being together for so long, of
course I knew what she meant. I
understand how she must feel when she
came all this way here in this kind of
weather and I treat her like this. With her
soft eyes staring at me, I felt guilt and
wanted to let her stay for the night. But
reality struck again, I said to her coldly,
"Let's go try the other train station."
We were living in the same apartment
building, on the same floor. Back then
there were four of us, and we got along
well. We would always eat dinner
together, watch movies, and sometimes
go camping. We were more like a family,
but I didn't know I would end up falling
in love with the only girl of the four.
Maybe it was during the last year of
college, having living together for two
years, we developed deep feelings for
each other. After she graduated she went
back home, and I stayed for one more
year to finish school. During that year I
was only able to take the train down to
see her on holidays, but never for long.